I wanted to wind down a bit before Christmas but work isn’t letting up, more late nights. But I did have another day off to use on Wednesday.

Went up to Hemel Hempstead snow centre, because I saw they where running an adult snowboard coaching session in the afternoon. The snow wasn’t great, the place was very crowded (er why aren’t all these kids in school?) and the lifts queues bad, but actually I think it was a good session. There was 2 of us in the session with an instructor, got some pointers on my turns, I need to add a bit more back foot pressure to stop my toe to heel side turns washing out and I need to be a little more aggressive about my edge to edge transition a speed, especially going to heel side. After the turning we went over to the learner slope and did some flat land freestyle stuff, just basics, but it was really useful, I’ve never been shown how to Ollie do presses and 180’s etc properly but I think I’m getting it now, I think I’ve found my board’s “pop”, what I thought was a rock solid plank is actually a bit of a pogo stick andI’m beginning to be able to use properly , managed to do some tail presses  too. Have loads to practice on now, so more trips to the domes is in order. Now I’ve found I can actually do a bit of this stuff on my stiff all mountain board, getting a softer park board has moved down in priority. Did fall a bit and I was exhausted by the end of the 2 hours session mindst. Also I broke a nail, bah.

Friday, another long day, into the office at 8:20am, sandwich for lunch, out at 7pm. Made worse by the fact it was the office Christmas party and most people buggered off at 3pm. But I never go to the office Christmas party, large social gatherings, in Ian mode, are very difficult and not pleasurable. Took ages to get home too, so by the time I’m in and sorted stuff out its almost time for bed. Damm and I really need to do a little shopping and checks on my outfits for Saturday and Sunday.

Lie in a bit on Saturday morning, needed it. Bathe and shave, dam there a couple of nasty spots and I cut my chin. I’m not looking my best, these long nights play havoc with my diet, to much junk and booze and my skin is playing up to Now tonight it’s the Festival of Sins and I decided to reuse my Lady Marmalade Burlesquey outfit. It takes a while to re find all the pieces. Damm, all the suitable pairs of stockings have ladders new ones are in order, the lace gloves I have are in a poor state, so must replace them (I seem to have lost the last pair I bought too) and if I want to wear the long hair, it really does need a hair grip, a Black rose one, and none of my (many) black rose hair accessories (even the ones I  bough the week before) have a grip, they all have  band or a pin, so yet another rose is required. Can’t really do the corset up fully either, dam, it’s the junk food Plus I’ve run out of toothpaste.

By the time I’ve found/checked/tested everything its almost lunch time. I have a small shopping list as well. Do I want to makeup and go out in Helena mode? Well that will take another hour or two, cutting into my time and the out fit is so complicated with the lace body that getting into in made up is difficult, so erm, ermm, well I’m out in Helena mode this evening and Sunday, so lets just skip it for now. Yes I am just a tranny, I have my needs, I don’t need to be physically presenting Helena every spare moment, just some of the time, though the thoughts about it are never very far away.

Right out in bloke mode then. First stop is the costume shop in Islington, ah yes, black lace fingerless gloves, cheap too, and (as I found out later) fit nicely. Result. 2nd stop, Cop.Copine. You see I’d spotted this dress in the window, black (of course), off the shoulder, with a sort bow/ribbon detail at the chest and sort of half baggy, half tight fit. I liked it a lot, and it would be something I could wear, so it was going to be Helena’s Christmas present (Ian could get the snowboard). Into the shop, find it ok, ah it comes in sizes “1″ and “2″, oh, I tell the girl serving “she’s about a 14″, what size is this, pointing at the “2″, oh that’s a 12 she says, I’ll see if it comes in a “3″. It didn’t but eyeball sizeometer says yes and it’s a stretchy material anyway, so let’s do it. Make out it’s a present for a girl friend ( I wish) and make sure I can take it back if it doesn’t fit. She wraps it up very nicely and says that will be £155 please. Ouch! I didn’t think it would be that much, but there was no price displayed and its sort of one of those places where if you have to ask, then you can’t afford it. New Look could knock the same item out for £30 I reckon.  Stick my card in the machine anyway. New snowboard is looking less likely by the minute. 

Tried it on later. Yes it does fit, phew. But its rather complex, inside its got an elasticated strap inside it that I think meant to go around your chest, just under the bust line, so it will hold its self up and sort of give an empire line, and then there’s another strap inside that limits how far you can pull it down. I guess this is all to make sure the baggy and tight parts stay where they should and to let pretty slim young things wear it bra less.  All this extra structure in what looks like a simple garment is quite unusual really even the little ribbon detail on the chest has a little silver chain in it. I suppose all this detail is what justifies the price.

It would have been nice to go in Helena mode to get it, but I suppose trying it on with all the structure would have been awkward with a face full of makeup and my shoulders would of have to have been hair free, so in the end Ian mode was more practical. So now I’ve got my designer dress, where am I going to wear it ? Orchid Lounge next weekend?

Back to the plot, pop into a pub for lunch, fish finger sarnie and chips is probably was probably to much. Am asked to remove my beanie in the pub! What am I, a hoodie? I’m over 40+ nerd hun.

Right Camden next, train arrives at the station as I do, more good luck. Trawl the hosiery places for the right pair of stockings, my favourite has a couple of maybe’s but nothing is must by, but one place in the Canal side section has some sheer ones with black bows on the bows match the ones on my skirt and corset, to have to get them. Roses, bows, laces, gawd I’m practically going sissy. They also have a rose hair accessory with a grip, its not perfect but will do and some black garter belts with yet more lace trim. Hrmm, the outfit always needs a little extra lace around the top of the sleeves, to match the corset, I’ve tried a few things in the past with bits cut from gloves or stockings, but they never worked well. Would these work? They certainly look right, but if they are designed to go around the thigh, maybe they will be to big for my arms. But I’m feeling lucky, get 2. Tested them later and they worked perfectly, giving me that “caught in an explosion in a lace factory” look I was after Not sure it it fits the theme of Immorality, but I guess it might raise an eyebrow.

Have plenty of time, wander around the markets a little more. Ah that, a grey off the shoulder sweater dress I spotted last time I was here, £25, of sod it, we are spending money, get it. Find it’s a little on the tight side around the waist when I try it on later, it only came in “Free Size” so I guess I’m at the upper limit. Still its not unwearable  and its actually about the right length for a mini dress on me (I.e. only just covering up the bits :)) and so I can make use of it. Came with a necklace as well

There’s about a 1000 Santa’s walking though Camden, singing “What do we want, Christmas, when do we want it, Now!” Well that’s not something you see everyday.

Finish my tour of the shops, picking up veggie sushi for dinner, well I has to keep it light. Train is delayed going back, there goes the luck, so I just read my book. Dam, near the end, its getting good. When the train finally gets me back to my neighbourhood I pop into a local bar just to finish it. Eric Brown’s Bengal Station novels are recommended.

Home, try on my new clothes, check the mail and websites start to get ready for the evening, don’t have to rush for a change. Right about now there would have been a photo session, but since I’ve shot this outfit a couple of times already, it wasn’t worth doing it again. Ready by about 8, didn’t want to leave till 8:30 so hang around for a bit. Put some of the lace and roses in my bag, pack my little camera and put on my big coat and its off to Camden again

Got a bit cold hasn’t it, brisk walk to the tube station and get a seat on the underground. A GG sits opposite me and gives me that little “I’ve clocked you” smile, but that’s really about it for reaction. Change to the Northern line and get to Morning Crescent on Time. In the lift up from the platform there’s another girl, Trans? Well the hair is a big wiggy, there’s a fair amount of make up on too but I can still see a shadow on the top lip, but she’s very short, dunno. We sort of notice each other, she must of clocked me. Wonder if she is going to the same place as me, hrm, unlikely, her out fit is regular Saturday night mini skirt and boots and I’m off the Festival of Sins. We go different ways out of the tube station.

Right, over to the Purple Turtle, hrmm no goodie back this time and £8 to get in, dam must of missed the 9pm entry by a minute (still its 52 quid cheaper than the Rubber Ball that was on the same night). Inside, into the rest of the outfit, seems to all be still there, but argg, little hole in the left stocking, I don’t even seem to be able to get one wear out of sheer stockings. Need to dump the coat, but the cloak room still isn’t open and its after 9.

Get a drink and wait for the acts to start, But its not long before Kimberly finds me. I’d had a couple of messages from girls saying they would like to come down to the FoS, actually originally there was 4 coming down, but Saffy had to stay home and Louise apparently drank to much wine that afternoon, so that left Kimberly and Rachel. Kimberly I know, but Rachel was a slightly unknown quantity, never met her before. Am always slightly nervous about meeting new people, I didn’t help that I’d bigged up the FoS on Angels. I hope people weren’t going to be disappointed.

Rachel arrives soon also, gawd, so young, I wish I had the necessary to get out in and about in my 20’s. We chat and drink a little (chat a little cause I’m the queen of awkwardland) before the acts came on and thank goodness, the cloakroom opens.

First acts is a rather unusual rock meets string quartet collective called BirdEatsBaby. Not 100% convinced, to be honest, OK, but not rocking my world. Pictures are rubbish, it took a while to find settings that worked on little camera. I haven’t managed to pluck up the nerve to ask for a photo pass at the Festival of Sins so I can bring my big camera, as since I’m just an armature snapographer I’m not sure I qualify anyway.

After BirdEatsBaby there’s a bit of a gap before the next act, try to talk to the girls, dance a bit (OK er I like the music, but its kind of exactly the same tunes as last time), get my photo taken in the photo booth (am waiting for the results), steal bon bons from the plates of sweets lying around and general make a nuisance of myself.

Oh but there is the crucifixion and the drinking of the blood of the fallen icon …

Well girl tied up with tubes on her arms to a cache of booze and strange bloke shouting “Desire” a lot they handed out straws to drink the blood with. I lost mine, so went and stole one from the bar. The blood is rather strong, er no change that, its very very strong, that’s a lot of alcohol in there. I’m not a drinker of neat spirits normally, so this came as a bit of a shock, I only mange 2 sips.

I chatted to one of women who put the whole piece together later outside whilst getting a breath of fresh air, apparently the “blood” was mostly neat vodka (I think there was a little absinthe in there too), they used it neat because if it was too easy to drink the first person up would slurp the lot and they only had so much. The straws where for hygiene reasons, but I pointed out not many germs are going to survive in that concentration of alcohol

Next band on was Viktoria Modesta, the same Viktoria I saw at Corset and Diamonds a few weeks ago, but she seems to have found a guitarist now. Actually I think this was a better performance than CnD, the sound was beeter and she had more room to move. Is she wearing the self same Pretty Polly Mock Holdups I was wearing last week?

Young men with very loud electrical guitars rocked us next. And they where loud, Until I wake rocked the joint, ears where ringing till next morning. I did refrain from head banging though. well I had to, my hair would go flying.

I must annoy people, yes I’m tall and I want to get pictures, so I move to the front, but even then I usually can’t make it, so I have to lift the camera up above peoples heads (Lucky its easy to use little camera one handed). But even then some people don’t seem to like even it, on person even tried to move my arm down. So after a few pics of each act I moved back, in one case I tried to wave people forward in front of me to the gap I’d just left, but sometimes they wouldn’t go. Bah What can you do, people want to be so “English” and not move towards the front as that would look “pushy”, but then again they seem to expect to have a completely clear view even if they hang back. I can’t win, even with little camera and not being at the front.

We had a little fetish demonstration going, same pair as last time. As usual I found BDSM not to be particularly
exciting to look at, I struggle to see the appeal, but hey, what ever turns you on.

Nara Taylor and her topless (male) friend gaves us quite a different act next, with Opera (proper opera singing here), fire eating, a bed of nails, broken glass and knife juggling, with a bit a theatre thrown in, all in a dark and fetishy vein. It’s a fine performance and you have to admire the skill of both the performers.

Last act was a fashion show by Am Statik, some rather fine latex couture modelled by some actractive young women, Seems to have to take a lot of pictures of this

Entertainment went on till about half one, gaps in between well, I tried to talk to a few people, danced a bit (noone really wanted to dance with me though)  and drank a little (switched to soft drinks after a while). Can’t complain really, good night for me. Outfit proved practical enough, well almost, corset stated to become a bit unbearable after a couple of hours so I loosened it off  But an hour after that I wanted to tighten it up again, weird.

Also managed to have a little girly moment in the loo. At previous FoS I’d had a couple of “Whats that bloke doing in here” sort of looks in the ladies, but this time, for a change, a couple of girls engaged. I was checking my hair and makeup when one girl asked if I could see a spot on her nose (yes, but it was very faint) and asked if she could borrow some powder to cover it up (obviously knows trannies always carry a load of makeup). I’d actually forgot the studio fix, but had some semi opaque MAC blot powder she could use. Another, whom I’d earlier praised for her dress (rubber halter neck with a sort of animal print) asked if she could borrow a hair brush. After sorting her hair she told me all about the dress and where I could get one like it,. But, its not for me, only a very young, pretty and slim thing like her could carry it off. Also praised another girl who had a magnificent corset and sort of hoop underskirt thing one, only to find it was Nikita Saibier the Corsetiere, dam, I sure she was blonde that last time I saw her. Not big things to most I guess, but the acceptance and trust shown in a female environment was a bit uplifting.

The entertainment finished past 1:30, time to call it a night. Kimberly and Rachel agreed and we got our coats and headed off into the night. Kimberly was going to walk back to Euston where she’d left her car (Euston is about a mile away from the venue), but I showed Rachel to the Mini Cab office so she could get a cab home. Me, well chips beckoned, nearby takeaway servers me with indifference and I go back to get a cab. Its not a long wait as they chucked a group of rowdies out the office. Cab driver calls me “Man” but I suspect he calls every one man (I regularly hear school girls around my way refer to each other as man, and in fact end almost every sentence with it). Well that’s my excuse. We discuss Islington speed bumps and speed limits on the way back. It’s not a cheap cab ride, but its quick and efficient. I pay him and retire to my flat, tired. Its nearly 3 before I get to bed. Another good and varied night at the FoS that. And the T-girl count at the venue was, as far as I could tell, about 6, gawd, its practically scene I hope Kimberly and Rachel enjoyed it, they seemed a little er I dunno, but they said they liked it.

Sunday, woke around 7:40, checked my mail on my IPod and er fell asleep again. Had a very odd dream about walking home from a club of all things. So exactly how I ended up (in my dream) in a small town on the California coast is beyond me. My dreams seem to make perfect sense when I have them, but when I think about them afterwards they are always total surreal nonsense.

I woke after the dream and checked the clock,. OMFG its 10:14. I have to be in Covent Garden, dressed properly for 1pm (and it will take half an hour to get there). That doesn’t leave me long to get ready and  I haven’t got an outfit prepared, ARRRGGGGG!

Scrape face as best I can, that Tea Tree face wash makes a good shaving foam. Then try and dig out an outfit. It’s a daytime do in a restaurant, with the UK angels, so OTT is out of the question. Eventually settle with a polo neck (hides the scraggy neck) and a little black skirt, skirt is a touch short, but woolly opaque tights make it a bit more modest. Though these days, for an Angels do, I really should of worn jeans. Try for minimal makeup and fail, far too much powder goes on.

Make it out the house for half twelve, that should give me enough time if the buses are OK. Cept they’re not, the right bus takes ages to arrive and its seems to manage to hit every red light and need to wait at every stop. Frustration, I hate being late. Jump off at Holborn, need to use a cash machine, spent to much at the FoS. Nat West machines are down, oh why? It’s turning out to be one of those days. Fortunately Sainsbury’s next door has one and there’s only a small queue.

Ohh, its cold again, walk quickly to Seven Dials, where’s this restaurant, ah there, walk in. Its got a big hall way before the restaurant proper, I’m about to text to see where people are, but a waiter comes around the corner and says “Hart Party”? yes that’s me. Guess I’m easily spotted as being one of a T* group then. But then again, as I find out as I round the corner, the fact is that  the Hart Party is the only one in the Restaurant. Ok that’s just me trying to make me feel better

I’m almost the last to arrive and I’m the local girl… But there’s a seat for me, its warm and there’ve already ordered some wine

I recognise Jess, Clarissa, Alinna, Saffy, Louise of course and Rachel from last night, but the rest are new faces to avatars. Just wish I could remember all the names me bad, as usual.

It’s a Moroccan restaurant, Souk Medina, tables are low and the food is sort of Taginey, they ask who’s a veggie, I put my hand up, but admit to eating fish, so they bring me extra fish dishes, a Calamari starter and a Fish Tangine. They are OK, I’m not the biggest squid fan in the world though, perhaps I should of said I was pure veggie. But there’s humus and pita and couscous and feta and various veggie dishes plus baklava for desert, so no  hunger pains here Me and Clarissa share the red, every one else is on white or driving, well more for us

We chat and eat, its all rather pleasant, and the restaurant staff a polite and efficient enough (aprt from getting the bill). It’s a good meal really, the Angels web site can get a little erm “heated” at times, but face to face, with food and wine, its far more civilised. It’s nice to catch up with Jess and Clarissa whom I haven’t seen for a bit.

I did have my camera with me, but there are no pictures. Well some posts on the thread on Angels implied they wouldn’t be welcome, so I didn’t try to get shots in. Angels is so not the tranny site it used to be.

Lunch takes a while, but we get there in the end, actually am surprised its still daylight when we leave :). A few have to rush, but 6 of use have a little more time, so more drink? Where, well there’s a pub almost next door, so why not. More wine and I’m getting a bit sleepy. People have to move on, in the end there’s just me and Clarissa and a quarter bottle of wine left. C puts that in her bag

It is dark now, but we just have enough time to pop into Forbidden planet on the way back, I leave Clarissa at the tube station and go to find my bus. Nearly nod off on the bus, but manage to wake just in time.

Rather nice that, lazy boozy meal in good company. Many thanks for putting it together Jess

Monday, the little sniffle I’d been having has turned into a really bad cold still have to work till 7 though. Work from home Tuesday, to stop infecting my office and to try and fight the cold. Work till 7 again

But the end is in sight, next weekend should be all go in PP
If I can fight this cold off and the forecasted very light dusting of snow towards the end of the week doesn’t shut down the whole south east of England