Everything seemed to be on last weekend, did a picnic and a club, but there was a possibility of a party, another club and a band and all sorts that could have been done, this weekend, er nothing appeared to be happening, so what to do? Even shopping doesn’t appeal that much, summer fashions are really too skimpy for me anyway. Suppose we can just go to the pictures.

Simple summery outfit on Saturday, new ankle boots (cheepo Shoe Zone tat, but they fit, look OK and are walkable), dark tights, keep saying they are in the is summer but to be honest, as it gets warmer I’m seeing them much less, skirt a bit on short side, a simple green shirt and my sunnies.

Played around with the lights, took quite a few pictures, but still ended up using the 2nd one I took. Knees look really knobbly. Would like to experiment more with back lighting and stuff, but the amount of room I have in my studio (kitchen) is limited.

Wander towards Islington, sun is up, pleasantly warm and no wind, it’s nice to have a bit of sunshine. Chocolate Banana smoothie thingy from Starbucks, new thing from then, quite nice, not normally a fan of Banana but as I age my taste buds change, didn’t used to like fish, broccoli, or olives, but have developed a taste for them, especially green olives, can’t get enough of them at the moment, don’t know why.

Decide to see Wall-E at the Islington Vue, could have seen Batman, but might wait until I can see that on IMAX (and that was all booked up this weekend). I’m a bit of a Pixar fan anyway. But there’s enough time for a once over the shops and market and grab lunch before the film. Might of heard a “That’s a man” type comment in Borders, but other than that I appear to be getting about fairly unnoticed, even in that micro skirt. Most of the local pubs and bars appear packed, there’s men playing with an oddly shaped ball on the TV at lots of people seemed to be glued to it, yuk, avoid. Picher and Piano doesn’t have a TV so it’s pretty deserted, have a veggie burger there.

Little camera does odd things in the poor light of the bar, but that pic, even though its cut off, perhaps has a little merit, perhaps from the oddness of the long exposure.

Back to the cinema, films one of the larger screens, not that full, but lots of kids are in suppose because it’s a U. But the film, IMHO isn’t really for them, yes it has its cute bits, but a lot would just go woosh over them. It’s a really really good film, one of Pixar’s best, it’s quite beautiful really. Even though the main characters are robots, with limited expressions and even less dialogue they really do across well, you (well I) felt for them. The plot might have a slightly heavy handed message about consumerism and environmentalism, but the simple joy of the characters makes up for this. Little touches like the use of short depth of field, (rare in a CG film cause its so computationally expensive), the strangely beautiful garbage strewn earth backgrounds and the little in jokes (like the sound Wall-E makes when he reboots) all add to the effect. Go see, reckon it could even melt a cynics heart, just that little bit. I’m glad I saw it, thoroughly enjoyable; a dark and moody Batman can wait until another time.

What next, er, still plenty of day left, dunno, OK perhaps a little shopping can be done, so get the bus to the West End for just a little look in the camera shops. Ooh Ooh they have the brand new Nikon D700 in stock, my current object of photographic lust. It’s not much bigger than my D80, but its a pro spec body with a full frame sensor and possibly the best low light performance you can get (like its big sister the D3). Want one, it would make the perfect event/club/gig camera as it could shoot without needing a flash. Only one slight problem, it’s two grand for just the body and I wouldn’t want to put my cheepo Sigma glass on it, so new top spec Nikors would be required as well,  so that’s an awful lot of money. Stop eyeing the savings account right now missy!!!!  And learn to use the fancy camera you already have properly!

Leave the camera shops without any new photographic equipment for a change and head to Forbidden Planet. Have nearly finished the current book, so get a couple of new ones, take a punt on some new authors for a change. DVD, Stargate Atlantis again, they do seem to be pumping out the season 4 DVD’s quickly at the moment. Find they have a number of fancy dress costumes in the shop, including a Lara Croft one, hrrrmmm, its like the one in the original game (actually I think it’s based on the anniversary edition), cyanish top and brown shorts, little backpack and belt with pistol holsters, hrrmm, medium size should fit me (tried it on later, yes it does, tight in the right way too), oh go on then, get it. A dressing up and photo session should be coming along at some point Already have the wig and artillery to go with it, just need to sort out the foot ware, it comes with some cheap looking boot covers, but I might get some brown hiking boots instead (Shoe zone again). Shop assistant calls me mate while I pay

Still without much of a plan I wander towards Leicester square, via Covent Garden, might go see another film, drifting though a few shops on the way. In MAC, check face, of bugger, bits of slap are flaking off try and fix it up, but it comes out a bit cold, look rough Buy a brush while I’m there.

Spot a nice glint of light off a building and snap. Well I like that sort of thing.

Just before Leicester square there’sThe Photographers Gallery well actually I didn’t know it was there it just sort of jumped out at me, been walking down these streets for years and had never  noticed it before, finding it on Saturday was an accident, a happy one all though.

There are two exhibitions on (the gallery is split over two buildings) the first is Danny Treacy’s “Them”. It’s a set of life size self portraits, with the photographer completely covered in pieces of various mismatching clothing he’d acquired along the way. Wasn’t quite sure what to make of the images initially, but when you get up close to them the textures of the various bits of clothing really come through, changed my mind, I ended up liking them quite a lot.

The other exhibition is Fashion in the Mirror, some fairly playful images from fashion photographers that mess around with normal model/photographer/camera relationship, bringing them all into the shot, with mirrors and all sorts. Interesting stuff, sort reminds me of my self portrait attempts in a small way (theme wise, not quality wise I still have quite a long way to go). Sorry for the wonky angles 0n the pictures, I was in a sort of wonky angle mood thats all.

Definitely worth a visit if you are into photography, it’s not huge so it won’t take long, free to get in to and very close to Leicester square tube station.

Wander up through China Town, Leicester square (Batman is sold out), Soho, up to Oxford Circus and the tube home, well it was a bit hot now, fil is sold out and had the shopping, well most of it, food and stuff can wait till later.

Back in Islington, well warm by now, let’s have a cold drink. Find a nice empty leather sofa at the back of Albert and Pearl for a glass of Chardonnay and settle in with the book. It’s a nice bar, used to be the Medicine Bar, one of the original DJ bars, got redeveloped, as these places always do, got a bit more of a gastro and cocktail focus now . Perhaps a bit trendy for me though, but the staff where perfectly nice. Try something of the cocktail menu (Upper street Spritzer I think they called it)  with a another couple of chapters. Book, oh yes, Making Money, Terry Prattchet, bit of a slow start, but it gets better towards the end. That weird sort of continuing period shift that’s gone on Discworld confuses me a bit though, the books started out as a fairly low medieval fantasy sort f thing and now appears to be in an version of the Regency period, but with the same old characters. They will have steam engines and the Industrial revolution next. But hey its Discworld, this sort of stuff happens, as the man said (At an Eastercon in the late 80’s in Jersey I think, I’m sure I  was there), “The first law of Discworld is that any other law of Discworld can be broken for the sake of a cheap gag”

Back home, via supermarket to put the feet up. Another random sort of low intensity actually fairly normal Helena day. Sunday was to hot to do much. Next weekend, Brighton Pride is on, back down to the coast again? might as well.

A new hope? Well I can dream can’t I? Big social Saturday for a change, picnic in the afternoon then the Magic Theatre in the evening, but had to prepare.

Mad bit of rushing around Camden on Friday night after work had netted me a few last minute bits and pieces, felt the planned outfit the Magic Theatre needed a bit more, so found a top hat and cape in a Fancy Dress place, cape was red lined, not sure that was right and the hat was a cheep plastic one, again not quite right. Saw a beautiful top hat in another shop, but they wanted £60 for it, I just walked out. Another corset in Burlesk 28″ , had tried my 26″ one the night before, to small, couldn’t get it done up enough to not look silly before it started hurting Really do need to diet, I did have an almost 29″ natural waist last year found in one of the Japanese Gothic Lolita places a much better hat little hat with ribbons and a veil and a sort of lacey neck thingy with a cameo on it. Last item was some fishnet stockings with white bows on them Gawd, I’ll look like an explosion in a lace factory After that to the supermarket for cake mix, stuff for sarnies and wine. New Tesco at Highbury (think Boris Johnson mentioned it in the Telegraph) has pretty much everything, apart from chilled wine

Baked the muffins on Friday night, well say baked, followed instructions on the back of the packet, I say followed, after adding 130ml of water to a Blueberry muffin mix I re read the packet and discovered it should have been milk, oops, pour out as much water as I could and add milk. Muffins seem to come out OK, tried one, didn’t die.

Saturday, up early and changing as usual, casual for the daytime. Wore a cardi for the 1st time, well I’m over 40 now. Also did the mini skirt, footless tights and ballet flats look that was huge, er last summer. The footless thing seems to be mostly over, lots of girls seem to be wearing black full length tights this summer, given the weather we have had recently, good idea.

Skirt a bit short, and tights aren’t that opaque. Hrrm, bit brave. Weather looked tricky, big rain shower around 10, but then the sun came out, forecast wasn’t promising, but fingers crossed it would last. Made the sarnies and popped to the local shops to get a few last minute bits, somehow I felt I didn’t have enough food (was proved wrong later). Shop keeper was pleasant and the slightly skimpy look didn’t seem to be noticed, perhaps they’re used to me around my way now.

Wandered down to the station around 1, sun still out but still pretty windy, tube to South Ken and down the tunnel towards Hyde park. Nice day, few dodgy looking clouds about but not many, wind has dropped a bit and I’m on time, and er where is everybody?

Think, have I got the right place? The picnic was organised by the Spectrum London Support group, and also several people on Roses and Angels indicated they where coming along. Wander about a bit, see someone who could be TG waiting around, but eventually see Spectrum’s Denise Anderson and her partner Mike walking towards the spot. Was the right spot after all, I was just to early. Blanket out, wine open and into the bagels, hungry, 2 is a late lunch for me. Perhaps a tiny skirt wasn’t the most modest thing to be wearing sprawled on a blanket in a public park.

Others turn up, the woman I saw earlier turns out to be Nelly Dunn from Roses. A few have travelled far to be hear, Chrisse Rogers came all the way from Stoke, with her kids! But they where quite angelic. Ate, drank, shared the muffins around and generally had a pleasant time, nice to meet every one, Nelly, Grace, Denise, Mike, Chrissie, Debbie, Natasha, Christina, Chrissie and er everyone else whom the stupid person can’t remember there names (take note pad next time). Still had tons of food left though, but the wine went rather fast. Rain stayed away too, and it’s glorious sunshine all afternoon, lovely This might be an annual thingy so I’ll be back next year I hope, Many Thanks to Denise for organising it all.

Leave around 4, had to go early, needed to change and reboot the makeup for the evening, but dawdle a bit taking pictures on the way back. Well I had big camera with me and it doesn’t get out enough.

Back home 5ish, ages yet plenty of time. Well I thought there was, noodle a bit, redo face much heavier, try to find stuff, put on the outfit and take photo’s and its like 8:15…..

Outfit, I think, works, I’m calling it “Helena Lovelace” (Thanks Ada) and the style “Steampunk” but you could call it Burlesque, Gothic Lolita or if you where feeling cruel, Sissy. Not the most comfortable of things though, the boots are hard work, the corset is done up all the way, a few bits are rather tight (Couldn’t fit the larger boobs under that top, it wouldn’t button up, had to go with the B’s) and its getting warm already. Still it get gets the What Katie did underwear, the boots and the skirt another airing. Pictures could of done with a better background (Note to self, get a new sheet, that grey one is getting boring), a location shoot perhaps All the steam engines or the difference engine at the science museum would be cool, or some old Victorian ironwork and bricks, a bridge or station or something, plenty of that still around London, hrmmmm…

After the photo’s, packed up, put the cape and hat in the bag (decide not to bring the cane) and covered up the rest with a mac, but there’s still those boots, the heavy makeup and the Barbie wig on display. After an extended hunt for my flat keys, I’m out the house. Get the bus towards town, feel a more than a bit self conscious in all this, but nobody comments, I think some try to avoid me. I guess I look so OTT, people must assume its fancy dress or drag, it’s not like I’m trying to pass.

The event has moved to Bloomsbury after problems with the Rivoli, much more convenient for me and saves me mucho money on cab and hotel bills, but some how feels a bit less special, I actually quite liked getting the hotel room and spending the whole afternoon getting ready in luxury with some wine and nibbles, then travelling by cab.

About half way through Islington I realised I’m not 100% sure where the place is. Panic, I think I know, but hadn’t made a note of the exact address, yikes, what am I going to do if can’t find it, ask for directions, get a cab, find an Internet café ? nerves treble. Get off the bus in Bloomsbury and walk (the best I can in 4″ Stilettos) towards where I think it is. Spot a group of the people in the distance in ballgowns, they turn down the street I think I should take, that’s a good sign. There’s an unsignposted entrance where I think it should be with a door people outside, “Magic Theatre?” I ask nervously, “Yes” they reply and wave me in, Phew!!!!

Change back into the full kit, A kindly El Zoro helps put a bit more tension into the corset and its into the ballroom. Well the bar anyway, cold drink first. Bar(s) are quite nice, there appears to be 2, one a sort of lounge and one out the ballroom. Bit more expensive than the Rivoli, but a bigger range of stuff and plenty of staff on hand, so their no waiting around. Out and wandering around, it looks a bit quiet, not that many people Magic theatre I, II & III seemed to be going by 9, I guess since it ended early people started early. With the break since the last one and that’s problems, and the change of venue perhaps some of the momentum that was building behind the event has been lost. Also it looks like Lost Vagueness had a do in Camden on the same night (Damm I’ve wanted to go to one of those for a while), and that I guess would attract the same sort of crowd, so I guess some people went there instead. It did fill up later with people still arriving at midnight, but it never felt that full, certainly not as busy as Act III.

Dance floor isn’t really moving, there’s a DJ not a band, a few people (there’s some Roses and Angels about) try to chat to me, but I’m difficult as usual Have another drink and pull out the camera and start taking photo’s

Take rather a lot of photos in fact

Too many?

Probably

Brought big camera with big lens and the flash gun for a change, trouble is it’s a bit heavy and awkward to lug about though, especially if you want to dance. Also it has that strange SLR effect, several people assumed because I had a big (professional some people called it) camera and was taking lots of photos, I was some sort of official photographer and they asked if the photo’s where going on the web site. Felt a bit of a fraud, I’m just a tranny with more money and vanity than sense and the camera is actually only a prosumer one, it just looks big, and I’m not actually that good with it anyway Tried to tell people the photos would go on Flickr in a group called the Magic Theatre. There did appear to be someone else with an SLR taking lots of photo’s to, dunno think he was the official one.

Tried mix up the photo’s and not just take pictures of pretty GG’s in cute outfits and try and show the diversity of the people and costumes there, but well the pretty girls do catch the eye. But it’s a nice event to photograph, nobody refused to be snapped, in fact several even asked (they probably thought I knew what I was doing, ha!) to be shot, bunch of show offs if you ask me (And I’m the biggest one of them all ;)) Couple of people offer to take my photo with my camera, but it doesn’t fire all the time, not sure why.

The entertainment comes on, the first act is the Frantastics a rock and roll trio (rock and roll with a twist is their description).

They are rather good, but anyone who plays “Jonny be good” is cool in my books, put a bit of humour and show(wo)manship into it to the performance to Floor gets moving and have a bit of a jump around myself. April Angell (who’s a proper event photographer) gives me some advice while I’m shooting, turn off the flash and go higher ISO. It really works, the flash was killing the stage lighting (which was bright enough to shoot in anyway) and the atmosphere and was probably distracting to the performers. Many thank April

Next act is a Burlesque dancer Marianne Cheesecake , doing a fan dance while disrobing. She’s cute and gives a good performance. The red outfit and stage lighting looks great.

After than there’s a violinist whom I forget the name (sorry) next. Not really my sort of thing, shes’s OK, but get go get a drink during.

After her there’s er, er, tip of my tongue er, shes a Jazz/blues singer that was at one of the previous magic theatres, she’s got a great voice and does a great version of Lady and the Tramp.

Another DJ break after her, whilst the next band sets up. The DJ turns it up the tempo a bit and more people are in the mood to dance, but my feet are starting to go, those heels are hard work and the outfit now quite warm, only blot powder is stopping my face from melting.

Last act of the night is the The She Creatures a group of Venusian Go Go girls bringing Space Rock to you Earthlings (being Martian myself I know all about Space Rock already ;)). They are excellent, I really like, loud (so loud the PA struggles to cope) fast and fun. They look fabulous too and have matching outfits, ray guns and blue fur on their instruments The Bass player also has a Theramin she plays with her fingernails or the end of her bass adding the retro sci-fi lo-fi sound. Get photo’s but put the camera away to have a big of an energetic boogie too. Definitely recommended and I’m going to try and get to see them again.

A few people said Hi to me after having recognised me from Angels, Roses, Flickr or here, which is nice, wow I’m famous NOT. Again thanks to everyone who took the time, there was Anthea, Louise, Phillipa, Mair, Alison, Penny, Gia, Karol, April, Miffy, Hannah, Jessica, Olga, Tara, I think, I’m trying to remember names, but a combination of tiredness, alcohol and mostly me being completely useless means I can’t list everyone, very very sorry

Do remember having chats with April Angell, Gia Giovitch, Karol Cross get others…. lovely to finally meet you all, and everyone read Karol’s blog, it’s much better than this one. Oh and it looks like I completely missed Rachael Fox from Flickr, sorry Rachel. Also Tara from Roses turned up, I’d been given a present to pass along to her from Debbie (I think) at the picnic and had been carrying it around all night, it got a bit battered, sorry, hope it was OK Tara, and Happy Birthday

Feet giving up by now, change into flats to see if I can last a bit longer, but its no good, by 1 something I have to head home. One advantage of it ending early at the Rivoli is an old person like me can stay to the bitter end.

Not sure if I had enough cash for a Taxi (booze was a bit more expensive here) so decided to bus it home, but get some chips first. While looking for a chip shop a bloke says “You’re a man” as I pass by, first comment of the day, oh well, I must of looked pretty rough by then I suppose. Find an open Kebab shop on Rosebury avenue, shop keeper calls me dear munch through my chips walking up the hill, and just as I finish them and put the paper in the bin by Sadlers Wells the night bus shows up, perfect timing Phew what a day.

Spent all Sunday sorting the pictures out (I took how many!) nursing a headache, have enough food left over from the picnic to feed myself all day.

Hope the Magic Theatre continues, I’ve heard the Bloomsbury Ballroom venue is rather expensive though and it wasn’t a capacity crowd, so dunno what’s going to happen. But if they do, next time I’ve definitely got to find an outfit that isn’t as hot and doesn’t kill my feet and will probably leave big camera at home.

What to do, where to go, hrmmm. No big plans, no socials, just a quiet one I think, next weekend is the big one at the Magic Theatre. Outfit for that is almost there; need a couple more bits, so shopping it is then. Would like a bit more hair, intend to wear that new that blonde Barbie wig but it needs a bit more, a sort of clip pony tail thing would look good, back to Hot Hair then, needs some gloves as well. But where, bit bored of the West End to be honest, so where different perhaps, checks Hot Hair Website, hrmm Birmingham perhaps, they have a store there, bit far, but on the fast train its not so bad, haven’t been there for years and. …oh bugger, engineering works again, no fast trains, scratch that. Where else? They have concession in Croydon, that’s not to far, and haven’t been there in Helena mode, Croydon it is, not the most glamorous of destinations (Sorry to any Croydonites reading) but it will make a change.

Saturday, dressing seems to go well, makeup is quite light and warm for a change, a bit orangey though, think I should get a lighter shade of Studio Tech if I can find a MAC. Clothes, well rain is forecast, it’s not that warm anyway and we are off into the unknown, best dress down, so jeans, sweater dress and boots I haven’t worn for a while.

Think the pictures worked, well, but on reflection I reckon I overdid the unsharp mask in post processing a bit. In a bit of an attempt to get out of the tranny ghetto, I’ve posted one on them Flickr Nikon CLS group, a photography pool for users of remote speedlights and the Nikon Creative Lighting System (cause I use it). It has been viewed a few times from there, no one has commented, but it hasn’t been removed or anything, so, so far so good. Also look a bit fat in those pics I’ve been good this week (mostly), but still have the weight, that corset for the Magic Theatre outfit going to be hard work

Walking to the tube station remember why I hadn’t worn these boots recently, they don’t fit so well and even though they only have a 2″ heel, walking harder than it should be and I have to slow down. Couple of gel pads bought from Boots in Victoria slipped in there helps though.

Croydon, odd sort of place, it’s like a small to medium sized city has been bolted onto south London, feels different. Could be down to the architecture, much seems to be 60s-70s-80s and is all quite tall, then there’s the trams, gives it a sort of continental air perhaps? Dunno, certainly different, camera comes out of course.

After walking off the wrong way initially (Doh!), I do find the shops, they have two shopping centres, that’s almost greedy Debenhams is what I’m looking for but passing by Applesnow I see a skirt that looks OK, cream, synthetic leather, pencil, £2, hell, why not. Do eventually find the Hot Hair concession in Debenhams, had the Barbie wig with me (in a bag, not worn) and the sales girl helped me find a matching clip on ponytail thingy, best they had was a matching style but the colour wasn’t perfect, but should be near enough in a dark club. Sales girl was a little apprehensive off me perhaps, but perfectly polite and helpful. Another sales assistant said there was a MAC concession in House of Frasier and pointed the way, next stop.

But on the way I stop in TK MAX. There are two sorts of people in the world, those who can shop at TK MAX and those that can’t. I’m usually the later, it’s just all to confusing, can’t ever find anything I like. But I do spot a jacket, blue denim, but sort of military cut, with sort of red cufs and lining, gold threads, badges and stuff on it, actually its pretty cool, looks designerish, fits OK, price, £29, reduced from £129 it says, wow, I think I’ll buy it, wait a minute what’s that logo on it, GSUS ? Oh that reads as Jesus doesn’t it, I’m not religious (flying spaghetti monster excepted) , so I’m not walking around with a jacket that says Jesus on the back, even if it looks cool and is highly reduced. No sale.

Most of the cosmetics concessions in the store where virtually empty, MAC on the other hand, mad house, they do have the Studio Tech NW15 I was looking for, but it takes a while to get served.

Hair and makeup sorted, rest of the costume items, need some long gloves, and have the strange idea that a top hat and cane would work with it (it’s an odd sort of costume, I’m calling it “Steampunk” but others might call it a bit “Sissy”, far to much lace ), a fancy dress place would have that sort of stuff I think, so go on a big wander to find one.

Cept I can’t. Do find a bar/restaurant called Tiger Tiger (think its part of a chain), looked OK, so stopped for lunch and a glass of wine an a comfort break.

Back to the shopping, there are a couple of groups of Christian evangelists in the main pedestrianised high street, preaching and singing away, slightly worried about what they will do if they spot me, but they don’t seem to notice. In fact so far so good, no comments, even relatively few funny looks. But then I spot my reflection in a shop mirror, damm, had blown my nose earlier and it looks like a chunk of slap has come of the top lip. Return to MAC and use their big mirror to do repairs (I ask and they don’t mind me using it), results are not as good as they where, haven’t got all the stuff with me, it looks a bit cold and beige and powdery. Makeup with me always seem to be a battle to get it looking warm, light and not to dry, having to put a load of studio fix on top doesn’t help that and the colours don’t match well, MAC never seems pinky enough for my skin, even the warm tones.

After the fix up continue my tour of the shops, confidence bit reduced though and still can’t find anything costume wise, hrmm what to do. You see there’s a TG support group in Croydon (link) that was meeting that evening, I had a note of the address with me, was in half a mind to hang around till that was on, but that was about 4 hours time, a long wait and I didn’t know anyone there anyway (and I looked rubbish), Lets not, maybe find another time for that. Still had those bits to find though and shopping opportunities before next Saturday night are going to be limited, ah wait a minute, remember there’s that really big fancy dress costume place near Clapham Junction and all the trains back into town all stop there. That’s it, off to Clapham.

On the way back to the station (went the right way this time), see a model and a photographer doing a shoot in the street. That’s not something you expect to see outside Croydon East Station on a grey Saturday afternoon, (it’s not exactly scenic and the light is really flat too). She’s (model female, photographer male, usual situation) young, tall and very slim, great outfit, but the makeup’s a bit caked (looks who’s talking) and her hair looks a tad dry, stylists off day? He was much older, has a big high end Canon DSLR. Don’t know if a professional shoot or not, don’t ask, but do take a few snaps with little camera.

Perhaps if I’d had my big Nikon with me and started taking pics of them with that they may of protested. Funny thing about big cameras out in public, they seem to cause people to react, sometimes positively, sometime negatively, but little compacts and mobile phone cams are so ubiquitous these days I guess people barely notice them.

Train back to Clapham, Party superstore shop is really big and it must have almost every fancy dress item you can buy. Find some gloves I like (even more Lace!) and a cheap plastic cane and a beautiful top hat, a bit Mad Hatterish in style fits well and is really well made. Trouble is its £45, Ok I’ll bu… no, I won’t that’s to much, put it back. Might have to skip the hat idea if I can’t find something mid week. Shopping done I guess, walk over to the Revolution Vodka bar nearby for a drink, a sit down and a chapter of my latest book. Barman tries to engage me in conversation as he mixes the cocktail, which is nice, but then he might of called me Sir afterwards. Not 100% sure if he did, though. Sometime I think when people call me Sir, or Mate or Mr when in Helena mode it can be a piss take, they put a big emphasis on the word, it’s all very deliberate and quite malicious. But then sometime I think it’s just a reflex, they have realised I’m technically male (not that hard really) and the Sir just comes out automatically with no real malice. Book, Terry Pratchett’s latest, “Making Money”, not one of the best disk world books IMHO, not very funny.

Bus back to town, problems with the Oyster system means free ride Plenty of people seem to be taking advantage of the free rides and the bus is busy. But it stops early, Just after the Houses of Parliament. Walk from there, need food (and wine), Tesco’s Covent Garden provides, get a bit much, have a lots of shopping now. Makeup loss, uncomfortable boots, couple of drinks, long day shopping and too many heavy bags are draining me and that usually results in more attention for some reason, hear a shout “Hello Mr” from a passing car on Shaftsbury Avenue, probably was aimed at me, didn’t look though.

Bus turns up, gets most of the way home and it also stops early struggle a bit for the last walk home, then its boots off, wine open and pop in Doctor Who DVD. Find I have a big blister on my foot.

Not the most exciting of weekends, but next Saturday should be fun, Spectrum Picnic in Hyde (it moved) Park, looks like there will be a good turn out for that and the Magic Theatre in the evening, with far too much lace

Actually it was last week, but that’s sort of why I haven’t updated for a bit. I tend to write this journal at work (er when I should be working), and have been off work for week, and although I been up to quite a lot, writing it all up has been, er low priority … sorry.

Back, back in time, weekend before last, Sparkle weekend, and as I think I’ve said before, I couldn’t go due to a family get together, but that got moved to Sunday, so hey, I can go to Sparkle, for a day trip anyway, just have to check the train times. Oh, Bugger, no Virgin trains that weekend, engineering works, next fastest train would take about 4 and half hours to get there, I can’t take 9 hours on a train for a day trip, sorry. Maybe next year then, but unless dates change, its always going to be difficult with all of my family birthdays around the usual date.

So what then, weather looks nice, how about a trip to the seaside? Get out of London for a change, Brighton, nah been there, done that, where else is close, Southend? bit rough perhaps, but I do know 2 people who live there, one is TG, but she’s likely to be at Sparkle and the other is my Boss, er if he sees me, yikes. Other places, hrm, well it looks like Eastbourne is the next nearest, haven’t been there, that’s a plan.

Dress on Saturday morning, nothing fancy, some kaki long shorts with some pretty embroidery on them, thin white polo neck and a recently purchased pair of white ballet flats, should be comfortable, androgynous and anonymous enough for a quiet day by the seaside.

Walk to the tube and ride that to Victoria, feet hurt a bit all ready and there’s a red mark on my big toes, first time I’d worm these shoes and they rub a bit. Can’t be having that all day, it will be painful later, dive into Boots when I get to Victoria and buy some plasters, one over each big toe and I’m fine footwise for the rest of the day (apart from the beach). Queuing up to use a ticket machine I realise I’m running late, figure by the time I’ll get my ticket and get to the platform the train to Eastbourne will have gone the next one is half an hour, but the faster Brighton train departs in about 10 minutes, what the hell, Brighton it is, haven’t been there for nearly a year I suppose.

Find almost empty carriage and get a table to myself. This doesn’t last, it fills up, and soon I’m sharing it with 3 other women and the carriage is full, by Croydon, people are standing. Sunny weekend, train to the seaside, no surprise really.

Brighton, sunshine, oh and a bit windy. Wander down through the lanes, have big camera with me and the new wide angle lens, plan is to take some seascapes, but the lanes are interesting and more than a few shorts get taken.

Stop for a milkshake at a place that does them in virtually every flavour imaginable, get a “Dave” flavour shake (their name, not mine) which has Ferrero Rocher and all sorts of other naughty cholocately stuff in it, nice Bit too chunky to get through the straw though. While queuing up for it , a bloke pushes past me to get to a fridge to get a coke, “Excuse me Sir” he says as he passes and I don’t think he even saw my face, oh well. Guess I pass for an aging blonde surfer type dude with oversize man boobs instead of a woman Apart from that don’t actually have any comments all day, but Brighton is known for its tolerance, but I guess like the bloke in the shop, many just saw a regular man.

Do look few a few shops along the way, but its not a shopping day really, do notice Hot Hair have a standalone shop, a couple of the hair pieces give me an idea, but don’t actually purchase.

Get to the Seafront, blazing sun, but the wind is almost gale force, hair in my eyes almost all the time. Have a beach blanket with me and a book, but its too windy to sit on the beach, so instead make my way to the waterline, take some shorts and remove the shoes for a paddle Sea is a bit cold and you do tend to get pelted with a few stones when the waves break, but its actually still quite nice really.

Move on to the pier, but this time go under it, more interesting grungyness with the sea crashing against the supports all makes for nice shots.

I though the shoes would work on the beach, they don’t, they get stones in them and they hurt, it’s ouch ouch ouch walking back to the promenade. Everyone with more than 2 brain cells to rub together is wearing flip flops. Must get some of those for next trip to the beach.

Walk along the prom, check the bars seeing if anything looks good for lunch, but only use one for a pit stop, hair is a mess. There’s also a little market too and some sort of mountain bike/climbing thing going on to look at.

Getting some lens flair in the pics, didn’t bring the lens hood, but I think it looks cool anyway, I might be in a minority here though. Thought about walking all the way down the front to Hove, there’s a tranny shop down there I could visit, but no wind gets all to much and wander back into town to get some shelter.

Find a bar, airy, quite cool, big leather sofa’s, quiet, just my sort of place, Stop for a glass of wine, a sandwich and a couple of chapters of the book. Nice place and good service, can’t remember the name of it though, sorry.

Back through the town centre, visit shops, well might as well, this, that, try on a couple of things in New Look, but nah, just not in the shopping mood. Brave the shopping centre Ladies for a call of nature, it’s busy, but manage to duck into and out without attracting attention, I think. They have Dyson Air Blade hand driers, cool Simple things like that amuse this simple mind.

Working my way back to the station up a different route find some interesting graffiti and buildings, sun’s gone in a bit, but I think the shots work.

I like using the wide angle lens in portrait mode a bit to close up, getting a really exaggerated perspective. Really am going to have to find some more tall building to shoot with this lens. Get my I’m really outside dressed pic just before the station.

I looked really grumpy, but it was a nice day honest and I like Brighton, people have complained to me that it’s a bit pretentious and full of poseurs, but I don’t see it that way. Its one of the places I would consider moving out of London for if I could get a job locally.

Station, Railway station roofs again! Train home, busy again.

Sunday, Parents, another train trip, more engineering works means it’s the slow train north. It’s a full house, parents, brothers, sister, their family and in laws, plus family friends. But as a sad singleton, I do feel a kind of out of place, the only one in a sea of couples and kids, with most of the conversation being about babies, and little ones. Uncle Ian spends most of the day eating (meat, sorry), drinking, talking to the cats and dogs and pushing his nephew around the garden on his toy tractor. Did take pictures, but my family pics are not for this journal or Flickr . Here’s some flowers and one of the cats (Willow) instead.

Monday, well I’d got the whole week of work, today was shopping day, and oh why not, lets do its as Helena, face didn’t like it, being shaved so close after the last time, but it survived. Didn’t have an outfit planned, ended up in yet another polo neck (Less makeup to do and covers my scraggy neck), kaki shorts again (shorter ones though) and dark opaque tights. Opaque’s are normally a winter thing, but I’d seen a number of girls still wearing them with shorts this summer, think they work, so go with it.

And that’s the only pic of the day, was going shopping in the West End, have done that a dozen times, and photographed it endlessly, don’t need any more. Dithering about the outfit and slow getting ready means it must be about 11:30 when I finally get out the flat.

Wanted another light stand and some gels for my flash guns, first stop was the big Calumet pro photography shop near Euston. But it was all rather expensive and I couldn’t bring myself to buy the pro kit. Walking into town from there, I’m thinking, gels, they are really just coloured transparent sheets of plastic aren’t they? Maybe they can stand the heat of powerful lights or something special like that, but do I need that? All I wanted to do was mess around with a little colour on my little battery powered speedlights. So all I really need is some coloured film or something? Paperchase on Tottenhamcourt road provides, A4 sheets of primary coloured acetate for 1.25 each, bargain compared to the proper stuff, got 4, can cut out a little rectangle and hold it on the flash with masking tape, cheepo DIY stylie

Bit of hunting around the camera shops got me a light stand (sick of using a broom handle taped to a table to hold the 2nd light) not a cheap as I hoped, but good value, (Jaccobs BTW) sturdier, heavier and taller than the one I already have. Comes in a long box. Bugger I’m going to have to carry that all day.

Next stop Forbidden Planet, handful of DVD’s and the new Charles Stross Saturn’s Children, the nerdself is happy

Lunch was Itsu on Wardour Street. Sushi, yum, but its not the cheapest in the world, so only have a couple of plates and it’s mostly veggie. Pit stop and back to Oxford street, last tiny shinny skirt from American Apparel wasn’t quite tiny enough, it was almost baggy, so get another one, in small, hope it fits. More DVD’s from HMV, have quite a stack, new Futurearma, Torchwood, Stargate Atlantis, The 4400 etc. The hard bit will be finding time to watch them all.

Worked my way down to Selfridges, they have a Hot Hair concession and I still had that idea I got in Brighton. Wanted some new hair, some outrageous hair for going out clubbing in or just dressing up, well why not. I ask the girl on the stand for something blonde and silly and she says she has just the thing and goes to the stock room to fetch one. Its very very blonde, very curly and quite long, its like Barbie hair, the wig style is called Wild, seems appropriate. Try it on in the area they have a little bit behind the stand, it’s not totally private though. It seems weird and a bit scary taking my normal syrup off in public to try it on, girl on the stall doesn’t look phased though, I guess I’m not they first tranny to visit. On it looks a bit er different, not totally sure, bit much? My daytime makeup doesn’t suit it either. Ask the price, £49.95, oh, that’s cheaper than I though it would be, considerably, what the hell, I have some new hair. But I put the old plain straight mousey blonde one back on first.

Walking through the food hall realise I’m going to need food, junk food for the week, fancy some more Japanese stuff, chilli rice crackers and wasabi peas especially, but I can’t find what I want.

Cross the road to Primark and pick up a light black Mac. Needed a light coat, party for summer rain and partly to cover up slightly wilder club outfits when taking the bus and tube.

Still want those crackers, know a shop in Covent Garden that sells them, long walk though, the sun is getting warm now and all that shopping is getting heavy Make it as far as via back streets Soho before I need a rest, quite little bar near Kingly Court provides a sofa, a glass of wine and a chance to finish the book, “The Kingdom beyond the waves”, recommended, but read “The Court or the air” first. Walking through Soho on the way to Covent Garden, wait a minute isn’t there a Japanese Supermarket on Brewer street? Yes there is and it has every thing I wanted, junk food heaven

Well I’ve got snacks now, but will need a bit more food (junk and real) and drink, Tesco’s on Dean Street provides most of the rest, but go slightly mad. Oh dear, far too much shopping now, struggle to the bus stop and ride home.

Apart from a few odd looks, I think I’ve gone the whole day without reaction, shops, bars and restaurants will all totally polite too. The West End is almost too easy really

Try the new skirt on at home, fits, just, very short, skin tight and shinny you tart. But I decide to go out it anyway. Well just to the local off license, neglected to buy any beer earlier, well I couldn’t carry anymore. Slightly nervous about going out in this tarty skirt, but what the hell. As I’m buying the beer for Ian self, Helena self grabs some chocolate as well, Girl on the till sighs, “I love chocolate but can’t eat it any more as I’ve been diagnosed dairy intolerant” then followed a 5 minute girly chat with me plus the other woman in the shop on the merits of various brands of dark chocolate she can eat. Which was really nice, I don’t kid my self I pass, plus I’m in that silly skirt but they don’t mind, that’s acceptance. Thanks girls.

Tuesday 1st of July 2008. I was born 1st July 1968.

That makes me 40.
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMFG where did my life go? I’m single, live alone in a rented studio flat, can’t drive, don’t really have many friends, not much of a life at all. I work as a techy in IT, read and watch Sci-fi , play computer games, take pictures and dress in inappropriate clothes at the weekend. Sad. Very Sad. Not happy. You are supposed to have your life sorted by now aren’t you? I don’t feel I’ve even started

Plan for the day was to sit alone with some beer, junk food and DVD’s and wallow in self pity. But I can’t even manage that, watch a couple of the Stargate episodes before I realised I must of missed something, look at the disk, its season 4 No.3, I haven’t seen No. 2 yet. Failed at just slobbing in front of DVD’s. Feel restless, wash by hair, well my wig anyway, the old one has it’s seen a lot of use recently and is looking tired, still restless I just go out. Eat huge cooked all day breakfast at O’Neil’s with a beer and that new Charles Stross. It’s good, read quite a bit. The book, the greasy food and beer and the sunshine cheers me up a bit. Find the Stargate DVD I missed in Woolies and stroll home.

Rest of the day well do manage to watch a few more, Futureama “The Beast with a billion backs” is pretty good, “The 40 year old virgin” is just cringe stereotype comedy and I can’t finish it. It’s also true, which is even more depressing. Go back to Stargate, and the book, and more beer, then some wine, and more beer and snacks and just fall asleep.

Woopeeedoo, the big birthday celebration

Wednesday, well after the previous days “Excitement” have a lie in, and work out how much I’d drunk the day before and wonder why I’m only slightly hung-over. Today was going to be the Helena celebration, a night clubbing, but that’s later, sort of noodle a bit, eat bread and stinky cheese, paint my nails pink and figure I need another prop for the photo’s I want to take, so pop to the shops for a bottle of Cava (I think I prefer cheap Cava to cheap Champagne).

Bathe, shave, ouch had run out of Skin Difference, and trowel on the slap. Had the outfit all planned, a shocking pink bat wing top I’d wear as a dress, new very blonde doll wig, extra extra large boobies, stay ups, 6″ platforms shoes mentioned in the last post, tight waist belt, and some chunky plastic accessories. My trailer trash drag queen Barbie look Totally OTT, but lots of fun, really, sexy? Not really, too silly for sexy. But that belt was tight, the boobs very heavy and that top wasn’t really long enough.

Took loads of photo’s some with some birthday gubbins and the Cava, some in blue light, some in blue and red light (using the acetate got on Monday) and some just vanilla. A few worked and they went on Flickr

Thanks to every one for taking the time to comment I needed a bit of a boost. Rachael, you are right though, the toy gun was a bit of a mistake.

By the time I wad done all that (and drank the Cava) it was almost time to go out. Slipped the tiny shiny skirt under the top and swapped the stay ups for tights for a little more modestly. Also went down a size or two on the chest (to merely DD), the weight of the big ones had already cause a red mark under my bra strap. Silly 6″ shoes where put in the handbag and flats (almost, had a 1″ block heel) put on and finally the mac to cover it all up (it had rained earlier so I hoped it wouldn’t look out of place) and off we go.

First people to see me down the street are two kids on the other side of the road. “That’s a geezer” shouts one. Well I’m not dressed to blend in I guess, but it is twilight and they are a distance away Also realise halfway to the tube I’d forgotten the belt.

I get to the venue at 10:35. The venue is the Soho Review Bar, which was formally the famous Raymond Review Bar in Soho, in that little quintessentially sleazy Soho alley Walkers court (I think) full of sex shops between Berwick street and Brewer street. This was infamous as London’s first legal strip club in 1952. I think the big neon sigh for it is a listed monument nowadays. The place isn’t a strip club these days I think and instead it’s the venue for several club nights, the one I wanted to visit was “Trannyshack”. I’d heard several good reviews of this place, but it doesn’t get mentioned often in TG circles I lurk in, perhaps because it appears to be really more Drag Queen orientated and the other being its on a Wednesday, can anyone go out clubbing late on a Wednesday and still go to work the next day? Well you possibly can if you are 22, but I couldn’t even back then and the only reason I’m able to go here is I’ve got the week off.

At 10:35 the doorman politely informed me I couldn’t go in, there was a different live music event/club thing on earlier in the evening and it was over running Wandered through Soho, got a coffee, felt a little nervous and silly, but most didn’t seem to mind and there was lot of police around. One guy did seem to try and chat me up though, put my head down and walked quickly on. Back to the club for 11, no not ready yet. There’s a little queue outside now, couple of girls, it seems passable definitely isn’t the desired look (So I should be OK). Another little wander and come back, must be about 11:15 now, and I can go in.

The club is £5 to enter unless you are dressed in a gender bending fashion, in which case it’s free. They just smile at me and wave me through. Change into the silly shoes, put my coat in the cloak room, check make up and strut my way up the stairs confidently. But get a little lost and have to change direction before finally finding the club room. It’s my first visit. You do have to cross a little bridge above the alley to get there though, linger and take a couple of snaps.

Finally I make it into the club itself. Oh, smaller than I thought it would be, and a bit rough around the edges (well it’s from the 50’s) but not unpleasant. The booths facing the stage look comfy but most have a reserved sign on them. There’s a few people in but its not that busy, I guess its still early by Soho Clubbers standards (but still past my bedtime) . Not really that many Tgirls either and half of them definitely suit the title drag queen title better, the rest f the crowd appears to be a mix of gay and straight girls and boys, some a little more mature, some quite young. Dance floor isn’t that busy either, but the DJ seems quite competent. Does fill up through the night a bit more, but its never heaving, at still the TG quotient is quite low.

It takes a couple of glasses of wine and Rolls Royce’s Carwash to get me dancing. Kind of work my way though the night like this, dance a bit, have a drink, dance a bit more. It’s sort of possible to dance in those heels, but its hard work, and there are stability issues (but all the drink so far consumed may have had an affect on that too). Do manage to have a little chat with a couple of t-girls, one, sorry can’t remember names, very sorry, said it was her first time there too and she looked a little uncomfortable, pretty though, Helena lack of Social Skills Love can’t of helped Was introduced to another girl (Patricia?), but she disappeared later with a man on her arm. Danced with a couple of the T-girls briefly, an admirer type man thing also tried to sidle up to me a couple of times (turned and moved away from him) and a GG (er I think, wasn’t 100% sure, not exactly pretty, but she didn’t dress “tranny” and was quite short) did dance with me er quite closely for a track. Kept dancing through the night, but the breaks started to get longer as the shoes and booze took the toll though.

One plan for the night was to leave just in time for the last tube, but due to the late start and I was dancing, that sort of went out the window. 2nd plan was to dance till the bitter end, stay up all night and watch the sun rise with a coffee in Soho. Plan 2 was now in effect.

They did have a cabaret at 1am they run an open mike, so anyone who wants a go can, and they did quality was quite variable, the best, an aussie DQ who was in a production of “Priscilla Queen of the Desert” sang well (Shirley Bassy I think), another girl who was in the infamous Pussy Cat Dolls also sang a number and a very slim young DQ did a good lipsync performance with props and costumes, to “Hey big spender”, again I think, wine and age has dulled my memory somewhat.

And then there was the other acts, described by the sardonic compare as “Car Crash”, 2 where dreadful, but funny dreadful and I think they knew it and where playing it up. That seems to be the point of the night, fun, silly, unselfconscious, camp and slightly (but good natured) bitchy and sarcastic. I have to say I enjoyed the Cabaret more than the Way-out clubs.

At each side of the club there where a couple of poles 3 girls used them a few times, and they really knew how to use them, quite acrobatic they where, and how to they move so well in those heels?

They appeared to be with the club, or knew the DJ, so I thought they where part of the show, but later on I saw a few other girls use them, nobody minded, so towards the end of the evening, when I was uninhibited enough (wine!) and the right track came on, I got up and gave it a go. Spinning around and sliding up and down the pole to The Divinyls “I Touch Myself” was a laugh, I must of made a complete fool of myself, but it probably added to the Car Crash element of the evening. Didn’t try any acrobatics fortunately (for me and the crowd).

It all came to a stop at 3. Almost glad, my feet where killing me, after a face touch up (and blot) went down to collect my coat and change into my almost flats. A man enquires about by plans for the rest of the evening, I reply I’m going home, without him. A bit short really, but then again, he didn’t even try to engage me all evening or even offer me a drink, I’m not that cheap you know, plus I don’t do men anyway (or anybody in fact, that 40 year old virgin thing).

Lots of mini cabs are on offer, there’s even black cabs around and a night bus that can take me home, but I still want to stay out. Stroll slowly towards Piccadilly Circus and Leicester Square looking for food. Find a kebab place open and get chips, they’re overpriced and the portion small, but it’s better than nothing. Eat them by Eros under the neon.

Still a few people about, its not totally deserted, doesn’t feel unsafe though. Walk back to Soho, stop for a chocolate bar in a 24 hour shop, notice I have a blob of mayo on the chin from the chips. Last stop of the night was Bar Italia, a fairly well known 24 hour café on Greek Street, opposite Ronny Scotts. Get a (not quite hot enough) cappuccino and sit on a table outside, its about 4am by now, sun should come up by 4:30, so decide to wait until dawn, just sipping my coffee and watching the last of the creatures of the night go about there stuff.

But they start to take the outside tables away by 4:20 It’s light enough and so I head home, on foot. It’s an hour and quarter walk from here, but I want to walk, get my head around stuff. Most of the freaky people of the night have gone now and the early morning people are starting to appear as the city starts another day. Strange man on a bicycle tries to engage me in conversation on Charing cross road, I’m head down walking quickly, but actually he wasn’t that bad, he leaves me with the words, “Just be yourself”, which was nice.

Walking back things well up, I nearly cry a couple of times. Last grasps at youth and all that, and regret I never actually did stuff like this when I was young. I guess I have Helena to thank to getting me out of the house and shaking off some of those inhibitions. But there’s still the issue of getting a life.

Man at bus stop near Angel says “Beautiful Lady” as I pass, decide I’ll take that as complement not a piss take.

The sun’s almost up now and the clouds are pretty.

Make it home around 5:40, by the time I cleaned up and change I finally hit bed at 6:30. I normally get up at 5:45 during the week, so yes, that’s a proper night out, proper birthday celebration, and even though I’m over 40 now, I can still do this and think I’ll do it again sometime

The rest of Thursday, not a lot happened. Finished the book though, rather good.

Friday, lugged my board to MK Xscape for a session in the Snowdome . Snow was pretty good, rest a bit shambolic, half a slope closed, roped off freestyle toys on the other, loads of kids (shouldn’t they be still in school?). There was a bit of a jump open *They roped it aof as well later), tried it several times, only managed to get a couple of inches or air, kept going to slowly on the run up, fear But didn’t fall (well a couple of hand plants) my normally riding was OK and it was nice to be cool (temperature wise) for a while.

Saturday, Helena again, 4th time in 8 days, skin is pretty bad now, plaster face with slap as best I can. Clothes are a tee shirt, denim jacket, bright Ra Ra skirt, opaque’s again and silver boots.

Quite colourful for a change, but today is London LGBT Pride, so decide to go with a bit of a rainbow of colours. Head off to the West End again to see if I can catch the parade. On Regents Street, I’m not sure if they are putting up barricades or putting them away, so ask a Policeman, he tells me the parade hasn’t got here yet. Loop around back to Oxford street and follow it down as that seems to be where the march is going to come from. Crowd get thicker as I go down the street, and I’m being noticed a lot, perhaps it’s the bright skirt, but more likely is that the crowd is expecting to see people cross dressed today, so I ping their TDAR easily, Its slightly disconcerting, especially after Mondays near anonymity. Doesn’t look like the parade will be here for a while, so have a peak through a couple of shoe shops, then get some cash out and some fruit juice near bond street tube. Hear voices behind me, “Fucking poof”, “Fucking transvestite” repeated a few times in the little shopping centre by the station, they follow me out side, catch them out of the corner of my eye , there’s 2 lads mouthing off. It’s not fun. But when I get out outside “Oh Its fucking Gay pride”, and they disappear down the street, think they might of realised it wasn’t a good day to be trans or homophobic. Often I think a lot of the negativity we get isn’t transphobic, not enough people know enough about trans to specifically hate it, but bloke is dress is seen a being automatically Gay and the abuse is homophobic. The knuckle draggers can’t even get the insults right.

Find a spot to wait, but It takes a while before the parade gets there. Boris Johnson is leading the parade, which I think is a pleasant gesture, even though he’s a bit of a twat. Camera comes out and photo’s are taken

By now a number of wildly dressed drag queens are about, and I’m noticed much less, being plain Jane in comparison, even in an orange mini skirt. The trans contingent comes by, nice to see its bigger than the turnout for Brighton last year. Problem possibly with the trans side is that many aren’t trans, out and proud, a lot (me sort of too) want to be taken as regular member of the gender that we present as. Bit of a dichotomy (or is it just me) we want trans rights, trans help, trans awareness, but a lot of us don’t want to be seen as definitely trans. Perhaps this is why I’m in the crowd not the march

There are less floats than Brighton though, most appear to political, commercial or religious groups also. Actually I think the Brighton pride march (or is it parade?) was better spectacle wise, more effort, more costumes dancing and music.

The parade moves slowly, so I walk towards Baker Street to see it all faster. Get a call on the phone, but can’t make it out, too many whistles and drums being played. Get to Baker Street to see the tail of the march, then duck into Selfridges for some food, hungry. Back to Oxford street Eat on the move, but the street is heaving, want to get to Trafalgar square for the rest of it, but decide to have break first. Glass of wine and a dip into my new book (latest Terry Pratchett not so good so far, haven’t laughed once) in an All Bar One. Bar tender is jovial and friendly.

Call was from Clarissa, she’s in town for Pride and a book signing, a few texts are swapped and we agree to meet in the square. Finsih wine and make my way slowly to the square and the main Pride Stage. Get another call, this time from Stephanie Delacey , whom I’d been swapping a few flickr mails with, agree to meet her near the stage.

There’s quite a throng by the stage, thousands of people there, spot many of the more colourful characters from the march as well. Find a spot to lurk, text the others and watch Sadie Thom play I wish I was a punk rocker.

With flowers in her hair? I don’t get that song, is there something obvious I’m missing? Camera is bleating a battery warning at me by now, brought small camera as It looked liked it had more charge than big, but its running out of juice too. Clarissa finds me quite quickly, think I must of miss texted Stephanie though, try again, phone refuses, that’s now out of credit! Not a great day gadget wise. But Stephanie turns up quite soon, with Luis Drayton

We try to talk but it’s a bit loud, but do take photo’s, if I nurse it I can get another couple of shots out of the camera. They all look good.

But in Stepahnie’s photo of me, I look like an old bloke in a bad wig. So it’s accurate then. We decide to go somewhere cooler and quieter for a drink, all the local places are packed though, so we go a bit further to the Ha Ha Bar (there again) near Charing Cross to chat. Tis a bit awkward, me being useless and all, conversation turns towards IT, both Clarissa and myself work in it, and both Luis and Stephanie are interested in it.

We head back to the stage to catch the Pretty Route, pretty much the only trans related act on the bill. Seems things are running late though, kind of loose the others for a while. A woman asks me the time and if I’m having a god day. Which is nice, but there are two huge clocks on building easily visible from my spot. Another asks me if I was here last year entirely dressed in silver, nope not me, sorry.

Band comes on creep forward to get a better view of the band but camera is now saying no power Find later I did manage to catch one picture

They are on good form, but look tiny on that huge stage, only get given enough time for two numbers though. Meet up with the other and decide to move on, there’s nothing really going on for us. Apparently there was a trans stall there, but like last pride, I couldn’t find it. 2 of us want to eat (The hungry hippo here and Stephanie), the other don’t mind, wander around a few places (Soho is understandable packed today), decide a bar so the other two can just have a drink would be there best idea, and end up in Slug and Lettuce on Dean Street with a sharing platter and a bottle of wine.

It about 8 when we finish, I’m tired, had half a plan to go to Club Wotever in the evening, but can’t find the energy, failed to get to Wotever AGAIN! We go our separate ways, try get a bus, but they are hiding, so tube home and rest. Lovely to meet you Stephanie and Luis, and nice to see you again Clarissa, don’t be strangers all.

Sunday, parents again, but they visit me and we have Sunday Lunch out. Spend the rest of the day doing that DVD slob out with the bionic woman.

Its been a busy week, emotional too,I don’t like getting old, being lonely and being unpassable, but there where good times and good people too.

Not many plans for the future now, still trying to work it out as I go along, though for the long term, that doesn’t look like an effective strategy Only thing on the horizon though is the Magic Theatre, its back on the 19th, in Bloomsbury this time, Drag Queen Barbie might get another night on the town …