Another Rivoli night, pack up the silly outfit, spare hosiery, too much photographic gear and more makeup than you can shake a subtly highlighted stick at and trotted off to Greenwich. Still not brave enough to go and check in girl mode though. (my excuse is, if I shave and change to early, my face won’t last all night, not really, I’m just a wimp). Get to the hotel early but they are fine about me checking in, so dump my stuff and wander around the Greenwhich markets for a bit, remember the nice foodie bit and get a bite for lunch and some sushi for later. Smack my leg on some metal thing on the ground, oww, breaks the skin, blood and stuff. Glad I’m wearing boots tonight. Grab bottle of wine from the supermarket and get back to the Hotel just before the rain comes down. It’s time to change, fancy just a nice glass of wine to enjoy with my bath, and er have to go to the supermarket again.
Note to Muppet features : Next time, make sure the wine has a screw top.

A long lazy change with wine, sushi, crackers and a few bits of chocolate and Helena’s ready to play. But first, the inevitable photo’s.

Had drunk the whole bottle of wine by now, well it was nice (plus I needed a bit of Dutch to go out in that skirt). Preloading, isn’t that what they call it these days, drinking before you go out. Wrap up in my “new” leather coat and go to reception to get a taxi. Had to spend a couple of hours the night before sewing buttons on it the coat, the 2nd hand one I got the week before, it was missing a couple but couldn’t find an exact match so replaced them all with new ones, isn’t leather hard work to sew. But it was time well spent, the coat covers up most of the outfit, so it’s not to embarrassing waiting in reception for the cab to arrive. Which it does fairly promptly and whisks me to the ball.

And so it begins. Chat to a couple of people and have my first drink (or so), say hello to some crazy people who read this drivel. But this doesn’t last long, since I’m fairly merry already, it only takes Tequila to get me dancing (The song not the drink). Same band as last time, they are good, but a change would be nice. My it’s getting busy and the floor fills up quicker than usual. Once again the little camera comes out and I start snapping away at anyone who will let me. Odd that majority of the pictures tended to be of the of GG’s bias perhaps but often they seemed more willing to pose, some (only some mind) trannies could be a bit camera shy, and the men, well, a lot of them really did put in the effort to dress up which should be commended, but they are just not as cute as the girls

Again, no pics of me, people did offer to work the camera, but well, didn’t want to take up their time. Tried to get one with the timer but the camera decided to take it at ISO 800 (I probably turned the flash off or something stupid) and so it was too grainy to use (G9’s are rubbish at high ISOs). Was shooting in RAW and filled up the memory card quickly, had to delete some, definitely must get at least a 2gb card for the Canon. Learnt a bit from the last time and toned down the flash, less blowing out of the highlights, this did leave the backgrounds mostly dark though, but I think this helped pick out the subjects. It wasn’t really that dark in there.

By now it is pretty packed, they are queuing out on the dance floor to get to the bar. Preloading instead, good idea methinks. The cabaret comes on, Miss Rose Garden compares (as in Act II) and does a couple of numbers (You need a feather boa to dance to “Hey big spender” properly ) , and we have a reasonably good guitarist (sorry forgot her name) and the lovely Vivid Angel puts in another fine turn (She was at Act I), one of the highlights of the evening.

After that there’s a Ukulele act, decide this is the time to queue up for a drink. It really is packed now, perhaps even overcrowded, the venue must have hit or be close to its capacity limits. The bar and loos and even the dance floor is full. Perhaps the Magic Theatre was a bit of a victim of its own success. Dance around for most of the rest of the night to the band and the DJ. Band needs a bit more time on stage methinks, but then again, the DJ was probably the best one they have had, its all quite danceable stuff and I’m bouncing around like a loon. Very warm by now, what did I say about wearing PVC from Act I, well synthetic leather is pretty much the same you minger. Plus, although those boots are as comfortable as 4″ heels have any right to be, feet are protesting now.

As with Act II it all ends rather suddenly at 1am with lights up. Another fun night, change to jeans, big sweater and Uggs for a stealthy trip home. As I walk to the cab office, Louise spots me and offers a lift. Many thanks Lulu, I owe you a drink or something, you’re a star. Grab chips as per usual and wander back to the hotel.

I change, clocks change, woke up the next day with a hangover downside to all that preloading. Spent the money Louise saved me on the cab fair home on a huge breakfast in the hotel

I see they are now going to run the Magic Theatre monthly. Good for them, nice to see it has grown into something this big so fast. But I can’t handle it monthly, the physical and financial strain (I mean I couldn’t wear the same outfit twice, I would just die) is too much. Plus it might get too samey going every month, I want it to be a special occasion, so I might wait until June or July (depends on the dates) before I return, but if you are going in the mean time, have fun

Usual Thursday routine, up far too early, get dressed sleepily, go to station, get train to Watford and … no this one was slightly different, I actually wasn’t going to work, had the day off, was going to Watford as normal, but in Helena mode. Was having a very long weekend, had Wednesday off too, that day Ian went to Snowzone in Milton Keynes with his plank, tried to get some air of the lip half way down the slope managed an inch or two, but kept speed checking before the jump as he ran out of bottle But did manage a flatland 180 (jumping up from running flat, spinning 180 degrees, landing and riding away switch) woot

Back to Thursday, Watford in Helena mode was a bit of a challenge, for a couple of reasons, the first is it’s a bit rougher than central London, I didn’t know what the level of acceptance would be like, and the 2nd was the slim possibility of running into colleagues from work (must of said this before, I live in London, but work in Watford). Since I didn’t know what it would be like I dressed down, very down, muted makeup, Black Uggs and coat with brown combats and top, slightly androgynous really, not brave. Plus it was cold and the weather forecast was bad, so practical really.

I like that picture, the light worked well. Next bit was the timing, wanted to get there early and leave before lunch (some work colleagues go into town on at lunch time, plus there are loads of school kids around then), but not too early as I could bump into people from work on the train. Again my courage was limited here. Got into Watford about 9:30, after the work rush. The main reason for going was shopping, (what else ) Watford as actually got quite a nice shopping centre, the Harlequin, with a good range of shops, but I’ve only ever gone around in Ian mode at lunch times or after work, and that’s all a bit hurried and furtive.

But since I wanted to be out of there by lunch time, my shopping trip was still a bit rushed. Found most of what I wanted, green combats and a Trilby from Mk One, a couple of blouses, shorts, a skirt, bra, tights from Primark, tights from Newlook, comfy boots from Shoe Zone (who had a number of size 9s in stock for a change) and a fancy hat from TJ Hughes and a look see at several other places. Wasn’t as bad as I thought, nobody commented, a few looked, but was mostly ignored by the public and treated politely in shops. One thing I couldn’t get was a particular Easter Egg, Hotel Chocolate had sold out of the one I wanted Decided to try another branch back in London.

Time seemed to fly by, it all was still a bit hurried, but I got back to the station at lunch time, a fairly successful trip really, pity about the Easter egg. Train was packed going back into town, on a Thursday lunchtime, why? Back at Euston, hurried sandwich for lunch, had wanted a nice sit down meal, but just didn’t have the time. Next things on the shopping list was some bits for the camera, googling had found the cheapest place to be a shop near the British Museum, an easy walk from Euston in Uggs. But the weather had turned nasty, in was windy and raining by now, coat had a useful hood though and I was glad I didn’t choose to wear a skirt. But it wasn’t pleasant, so decided to take a short cut through the British Museum instead to get out of the rain.

Yeah using this great museum full of priceless historical artefact’s as just a way to dodge a bit of rain on a way to a shop, bit shallow that. But a few things did catch my eye (mostly the cool roof though) and I did linger a bit and take a few pics

Still think the roof is the best bit though Out, still a bit rainy, find the shop Microglobe, I think its mainly a web operation, the shop is just an office, a counter and a stockroom, but they do know what they are talking about, have the main items I was looking for (a Nikon SB600 flash and a diffuser) at by far the best price I had seen. Good place. Didn’t realised this, but there are loads of camera shops around the British museum, bit a of a retail cluster going on. One item of photographic equipment I still wanted was a diffuser for the popup flash.

Explanation, I now had two flash guns, which can be triggered remotely via an infrared signal from the popup, that will work as key and a fill lights (like studio lights, but cheaper and more portable). The thing is the popup flash still fires when it triggers them, though it can be turned down, I didn’t want that affecting the pictures as you can get a shadow and stuff. Now there is a gadget you can get from Nikon that will block all the visible light and just let through the infrared from the popup, but its very hard to get hold of, so next best thing is to spread the light as much as possible to prevent flash shadow and reduce the light it adds to the scene. A standard diffuser dome wouldn’t fit, but I’d seen these little screens on the web that would do the same job. Trouble is none of the camera shops I asked in had heard of them Oh well.

Also I really wanted that Easter egg, thick mixed milk and dark chocolate with boozy chocs inside so got a bus to the city to try and get one from Hotel Chocolate’s Moorgate branch. I mean city types aren’t into chocolate that much, they’re sure to have stock. After what felt like an endless bus journey (any rain and London traffic goes even slower), got there. And it’s packed, city types are stripping the place bare and there are queues at the tills, so I was wrong about them, they really do like chocolate. And they had sold out of the egg I wanted also Make do (well it isn’t much of a hardship really ) with a smaller basic thick milk chocolate egg and some individual dark and milk chocolates.

Still more stuff to get, busy, busy, busy. One reason for all this shopping was I’d planned to do a little photo shoot on Saturday, for fun, but had some very specific ideas about what to wear (The hat and green combats all part of this), and what to shoot with (the flashgun and diffuser) and what to shoot against (come to that later). Next thing on the list has a high necked sheer top and some double sided tape to attach my boobs to my chest (one of the outfits I wanted to wear wouldn’t suit a bra). Best place I for that I reckoned was Doreen’s, bit of a trek, bus and tube, but still had time. First bus I got on goes two stops then chucks every one off, as they are turning around, why? It was miles from the end of the route, so get train up from Moorgate instead.

Hop from train onto the Victoria line train waiting in the station. And nearly 10 minutes later it’s still waiting Signalling problem apparently, hearing those automated tannoy message about there being a good service on the Victoria line while waiting is a bit ridiculous. Sod it, have loads of shopping, need a “Pit stop” and I’m close to home, get off the train and walk back to the flat.

But it isn’t to late yet, feeling a bit better for the pit stop and now unencumbered by shopping, head back out, decided to leave Doreen’s until the next day and bus it back to the West End. Slowly, what’s with traffic today. Still had a few camera shops to check and thought I might be able to get that sheer top (well body stocking really) in one of Soho’s ahem shops. Camera world, me “Er, do you have a popup flash diffuser?” Sales guy “Well all we have are these thing’s” pulling something out of a box, Yes, exactly what I wanted, result a tour of Soho’s ahem shops (I felt very embarrassed just going in them, especially as Helena) resulted in nothing no tops like that at all. As a last resort I even tried “That” shop in Euston, you know the one, even more embarrassed about going into that, but they don’t have one either, they are quite nice though and I don’t get the hard sell like many report.

I get these daft idea’s about a particular outfit I want to wear and search high and low for all the elements, but if I can’t find them I get a bit down, silly really. Think about it as I walk home and figure I can improvise with a top I already have, it’s not perfect, but will have to do. It’s been a long day, grab a bite to eat in St Pancras (it’s on the way).

By now I want a drink and a sit down and Clockworks on Pentonville Road mixes a mean cocktail, plan. A Cosmopolitan and a chapter or two of my book and I’m feeling better, but the books getting towards the end and I want to keep reading, pop into the Cedar Room in Islington to continue, but by the time my drink is mixed (a Lemon drop martini, nice) all the tables are gone, nowhere to sit apart from the bar finish my drink and leave. Home. Tired.

Friday is good (Friday), back to Ian, I was alternating Ian/Helena for Easter, both needed time Get to Doreen’s successfully this time, the tube works, feels slightly odd going in male, but as needs be, got the tit tape and enquired about a sheer top. Apparently they did used to sell them (I had one of these tops years ago, but laddered it and threw it out during a purge anyway) but the company that did them went out of business. So that’s why I couldn’t find one.

Get a few more things in Walthamstow, specifically weapons… Not real ones of course. One of the outfits I had planned was a “Bad girl” in leather look, and she needed artillery to accessorise with. Toy guns of course, airsofts would have been ideal, but I can’t buy them anymore (you have to be a registered airsoft skirmisher to legally buy them these days in the UK), so I was looking for regular toys. They only place that seems to sell such un PC toys these days are pound shops, suits me the 99p shop had some quite good long slide 45’s and the Poundland had some almost perfect Berretta M92’s (as seen lots and lots of action movies). Of course these being toys, they are brightly coloured with orange tipped barrels, but I can sort that. Lock and load.

Back home and it’s a prop and scenery build. The pistols where sprayed sliver and then black (used spray cans and a recycling tub as a spray booth), so when I ran a nail file over the edges it rubbed of the black paint to show the silver underneath and old modeller trick to simulate wear and tear I used to do quite a bit of 3d modelling and one thing you learn is to always try to add a bit of imperfection, dirt and wear to things, it seems to make them a lot more realistic, same applies to practical models. Not perfect replica’s, but good enough for my needs and a lot cheaper than airsofts too. The M92’ss were part of a police play set that including handcuffs, a pair where sprayed sliver as well.

I didn’t want to shoot my pics against my grubby kitchen wall/floor, and the white sheet over a bed frame used before wasn’t ideal so I put together a backdrop using a black valance sheet and some bamboo canes all held together with bulldog clips, clothes pegs and duct tape. First attempt was quite neat, with all the edges of the sheet folded back, but it wasn’t quite big enough. The 2nd version with the edges of the sheet spread out wasn’t as tidy or stable but did the job. Again a much cheaper alternative to a proper photographic backdrop, not as good, but good enough

All this craft type stuff to build the props and sets on the cheap was rather fun and another outlet for the creativity.

Saturday, shoot day, well it was to cold to go out anyway First outfit was the Battlestar Galactica Starbuck one I’d been mentioning in previous entries. Tried to do the makeup as minimally as possible, as she really isn’t the glam sort.

Not bad, best likeness I could manage, vest and belt aren’t exact and I’m missing the tattoo, plus I think Katee Sackhoff has bigger muscles than I do. I know Starbuck doesn’t normally have long hair, but I don’t have short wig and there is this period in the early part of the 3rd season where she does have long hair, but is back with the fleet (before symbolically cutting it short again in about episode 6). The weapon is another pound shop special, not a good replica of the one they use on the show, but I didn’t have a great choice.

Next outfit was all that leather (most was actually synthetic) and the props and much heavier makeup, took more pictures than usual with this one as it was fun Two variations, one with a jacket and stockings, one with a corset and leggings, used that top I mentioned, worn backwards, the other side had pretty flowers embroidered on to it, not the exact thing I was going for. Those boots are surprising comfortable, have decided to wear them and a variation of this leather outfit to the Rivoli next week.

Last outfit and sequence of pictures was meant to be a sort of Burlesque striptease, a bit retro, funny, saucy, naughty and flirty, but not in your face “fuck me”. It was inspired by the Vivid Angels performance at the Magic Theatre and was an excuse to wear that “What Katie did” underwear Laddered a stocking putting them on hid that as best I could. Watched a couple of “How to do 50’s pinup makeup” vids on You Tube and tried to replicate. Bit of change, a new experience, fun but not one I would repeat with any kind of audience.

No more shoot pics after that, camera batteries where flat anyway. Changed into something more normal, took a couple of snaps of the “studio” with the other camera.

Went out for a celebratory takeaway afterwards and then spent the rest of the night sorting out the pictures. Actually that took a while and I was up to the early hours. Quite a few adjustments where required, usually balancing, sharpening etc but, I had painted my nails red for the day, but Starbuck wouldn’t have red nails, so that had to be painted out. Also the skin tones on the striptease pics needed balancing, my face and body didn’t really match plus the one of my back, did er, well, need a fair bit of work done to it, haven’t had a wax recently you see… (Too much information, too much information). Perhaps the black background and all those black clothes wasn’t a good idea, they can get lost a bit and the lighting isn’t as dramatic as I hoped I could get, plus I have gained some weight so not as good as they could of been. Flickr reaction to them hasn’t been overwhelming either.

Sunday er, it’s snowing (didn’t settle) and virtually everything was shut, dull really, did laundry, finished my book, started another one, Matter by Ian M Banks, and again was up to late, all in Ian mode. Having to much time off work tends to do weird things to my sleep patterns.

And so to Easter Monday, another Helena day, but a usual average one really, Camden and the West End in a silly out fit, followed by a trip to the supermarket and bus home, normal (for me). Was up early again, and was probably a bit sleep deprived by now, felt grumpy. I had planned the outfit the night before, it looked cool then, but felt foolish when outside, shorts with grey tights (two pairs for warmth) plus pink accents and a furry coat. Almost everyone else out and about was just in plain sweaters, big coats and jeans, sensible clothes as we are still getting snow flurries. Hair is looking bad too, been used a lot recently, needs a wash. No photo’s today, all photo#ed out really, plus I hadn’t recharged the big camera.

Couple of blokes spotted me on the train and had a good laugh, one got up and manoeuvred around to get a better look. Being laughed at by what where a particularly unimpressive (overweight, ill kept, middle aged, badly dressed and generally totally fugly) pair of males didn’t help the confidence or mood. They got off the train at Camden as well, lurked in the station a bit reading signs until they had definitely left and took a different route to the market. Got a few more comments that day as well, even in Camden Tried on a dress, didn’t fit, but did get a couple of blouses, some stockings to replace those I laddered and a coat. The coat was 2nd hand long leather one, very cheap but had a couple of buttons missing, can fix that. Wore the long coat after I bought it, more to hide under. Lunch was a nice veggie burger (I keep wearing leather, but don’t want to eat meat, bit of a contradiction there ) in Hache, followed by a bus ride to the West End, looked around a little, coffee, went to Tesco’s, bus home, crashed out.

Tranny batteries are going a bit flat now, Helena’s had a lot of time out recently and so needs a bit of a rest. I see some of the other bloggers are planning a Tranny Flickr day on the 29th where they will definitely dress and post a photo. Perhaps I need a tranny inactivity day instead, where I stay in Ian mode, watch football, drink 10 pints of larger and get in to a fight. But I don’t get football, fall asleep after 5 pints and run away from fights, oh and the 29th is the Magic Theatre Act III, so there’s no chance of my not being dressed that day

Jessica Hart had posted on Angels that she would be in town on Friday night a while ago, on the off chance, last week I PM’ed her asking if she still wanted company, she did, so that was Friday night sorted. But what to wear, Jessica is usually very well dressed, so I try to dress a bit smart when I see her. A mid week Primark raid had netted a smart suit jacket, Jessica mentioned for a laugh she wanted to outrage a few tourists, well I can’t resist a challenge so I matched the suit jacket with a tiny little black skirt from Bay, a white blouse and some black courts for an attempt at a power dressed business woman.

That skirt is very short, but at 12.5 inches not “too” short (12″ is the limit for out in public ). Dashed home from work Friday night and change as fast as possible, but its still 8:15 before I get out. But immediately run into a problem, it’s the first time I’ve worn these shoes outside the flat, big mistake. They don’t fit, to get the width I went to size 10, but they don’t fit the heels properly and flop, and every now and then fall off Walking on the pavement is very awkward, and I must look ridiculous, that and the tiny skirt and I must have a huge neon sign over my head that says “TRANNY”. Hobble as far as the bus stop and wait, for what seems like ages Kids on bikes ride past and shout “Man” at me, others look but hold there tongues. It’s too late to go and change now, bus arrives eventually and I get on but it seems to crawl towards the West End, I’m going to be late, text Jess to apologise. A few more texts, some more hobbling, an attempt to pack out the shoes with bits of tissue, and lot of stares and we eventually meet up at Piccadilly Circus, about 10 minutes late, sorry. Jess looks lovely of course, feel slightly embarrassed as we go and look for somewhere to eat. I suggest branch of Garfunkel’s, as frankly it’s the first place I see and I didn’t want to walk far, the original idea was a Angus Steakhouse, (for purely ironic reasons you understand), but I think it’s actually illegal anyone who lives in London to eat in ones of those :). But Garfunkel’s was touristy enough, staff offer us the seat us right in the window, hell why not, we take it, let the world see us for the gorgeous creatures we are. Food isn’t bad, but not great either, wine is fine and the company good, and that’s what really counts for a good night out. The window seats offers a good view of the Friday night West End crowd, spot several people in skirts as short or shorter than mine, with heals, so I’m not totally out of place, but the vast majority wearing such attire are at least 15 years younger than me, and almost certainly don’t have a Y chromosome.

After dinner we move on, I suggest the large “On Anon” Bar near Piccadilly Circus, but they want a £10 cover charge to go in, not likely, we instead try a busy pub just of Shaftsbury Avenue for a nightcap. The Soho pub is friendly and so we have another glass of wine, then it’s good night and we go our separate ways, bus home. Cya again soon Jess.

Saturday, up early and try to shave, find there’s not much to cut off, the Clarins Skin Difference stuff really does seem to slow down beard growth, and it does make it a bit easier to shave. Manage to hack of what’s there without to much blood, Change into something less formal, makeup, oops have run out of Prep’n'Prime, try some pale green eye shadow (to match the outfit) on the lids for a change, well why not, actually doesn’t look too bad. Am out by 9, early for a change.

OK the look is still a bit too structured, but seems to work, and is practical and comfy, if slightly plain. Skirt was from a Primark clearance rack, £2! Notice I’m not noticed nearly as much, even though the skirt is still pretty short, being comfortable and relaxed does seem to help a lot when out, as does being a bit plain Jane. Coffee & muffin then bus towards London Bridge.

Haven’t done an “Look I’m on the bus” picture for a bit Plan for the day was Borough Market, Waterloo and then Zara and then er what ever. Oh markets again, “sticks tongue out” well I like them, plus it’s a food market, so bit of a change. Just wander and absorb the sights, sounds, smells and tastes (there’s a not insignificant amount of free samples going on offer). Muffin earlier was a mistake, should of waited to eat here. Couldn’t maintain being veggie, had managed all week and was quite proud of it, even with steaks on the menu the night before I had opted for a Spanish Omelet, but here, well, I couldn’t help myself, if I’m going to eat meat, I would prefer free range organic meat cooked properly, fortunately there’s plenty of that in Borough Market. End up with some Brie, some very very good Stilton (not usually a fan but this stuff was awesome), a baguette and a couple of Nata (little Portuguese custard tarts). Borough Market is recommend for food lovers everywhere and is a fine place to spend a Saturday morning.

Many thanks to the smiley girl who took that standing still picture. Spent a couple of hours here, no problems acceptance wise, might have been called sir once, that’s about it. Was planning to take the bus to Waterloo afterward, but it’s a nice enough day for March and I was wearing comfortable boots, so decided to walk there, along the South Bank instead, doing the tourist bit, and of course taking pictures. Pop into the Tate Modern, not exactly my favourite gallery but its there and its free (cheapskate!), in the main halls there’s just this crack in the concrete thingy, the mind boggles.

Around the base of the OXO tower there’s a number of little designer shops that are worth a look, and there’s a photography exhibition going on, some spectacular landscape work, I thought it was mostly HDR stuff to start with, but no, its actually mostly on film, the exhibition was called “Waiting for the Light: Photography by David Noton capturing the world’s most beautiful places.”. By now though, I had a small problem, needed the loo As I’ve said before I’m very wary of using the ladies when out, but found one in a quiet little one in a corridor that looked deserted. Went in, nobody there and its all quite nice, lock cubicle. But then I hear voices, Oh bugger, sounds like a woman with her family, at least 3 kids Bottle it, stay in the cubicle until they sound like they have left, which is several minutes, as the kids sounds like they to want to play with the hand driers. After it goes quiet, step out, all gone, safe, wash hands and brush hair. I’m a total coward when it comes to public toilets dressed. Pass the lifts as I make my way out of the tower and notice a sign for a public viewing gallery. I knew there was an expensive restaurant at the top of the tower, didn’t know there was a public area, so take lift to the top, you have to pass through the restaurant to get to it, its small but the view isn’t bad. Take photos as usual, but the camera (the little G9) is bleating at me, low battery and full memory, oops I’ve been shooting in RAW and filling up the card, delete a few duff ones and switch back to JPEG. There’s enough battery left to get a few more shots, but my photography for the rest of the day is a bit more selective. On the way out notice something else, as well as the restaurant there’s a brassiere, cheaper than the main restaurant, but still not exactly McDonald’s, and there’s a bar… Get a pleasant glass of Pinot Grigio and read a chapter of my book. Would like to dine up here one day.

More relaxed after that, continue on my way down the South bank to Waterloo. An odd choice of destination given I wasn’t planning on taking the train anywhere, but I did have a plan, destination was actually Lower Marsh street around the back of Waterloo. Fetish dealer Honour have a small shop here and I wanted a couple of things you just can’t get in Primark (just stuff for playing dress up in though), definitely wanted some of their long leather (synthetic) opera gloves and was on the lookout for a top too, all to match those boots I got last week. Find the gloves and a lace up leather corset/bodice/basque thingy that can be worn high enough to cover up what I haven’t got naturally. Dress up and photo session next weekend is pencilled in Girls in the, shop are nice and helpful, one of them ever so slightly flirty. Also pop into the Radio Days retro store next door, was looking (not that seriously) for a little 50’s style hand bag and hat to go with another dress up outfit, they have a lot of stuff, but nothing was right.

Next place on my list was Zara, head back through Waterloo, grabbing a bite to eat on the way. Doesn’t the old Euro Star terminal look forlorn. Then out across the river on the Hungerford bridge towards Covent Garden.

Stop by Cyber Candy on the way through, it’s a shop that sells all sorts of imported sweets and drinks you normally can’t get in the UK (At highly inflated prices I might add), Ooo Jolt Cola, nerdgasm, have to buy some. Grab some salad and other bits to go with the bread and cheese in M&S, curious guy on the checkout seems to want my life story and asks how I am and where I come from etc. Zara was a bit disappointing, I wanted a black racer back vest and had seen one in another branch recently, but they don’t have one But American Apparel (there again) did and they also had some Lycra legging with a sort of leathery finish that matched the gloves I had just bought too, kerching. Got the racer back, already had the brown combats, now I needed the grey top and the octagonal dog tags. If you are a Battlestar Galactica fan you might see where this is going Stop by MAC to get some Prep’n'Prime, get a message later through Angels, another girl, Natasha, had spotted me in there, but didn’t approach as she was in bob mode at the time, and there I was thinking I was anonymous.

Forbidden planet have the dog tags, Starbuck ones specifically, Yey, last time I looked they had everyone else’s but hers so I guess they go fresh stock. The BSG outfit I’m trying to put together is the off duty Viper pilot outfit, boots and brown combats, grey marl top with a black vest over it and the dog tags. The exact look I’m going for is Starbuck, early to mid 3rd season when she still had long hair, but had rejoined Galactica, why this one? well it’s the character I like to think I most resemble (its not a much of a likeness though) and the easiest costume to put together, face it I’m not going to be able to do Boomer or Six am I. Realise the grey top they wear is sleeveless, don’t have one like that, so next priority is one of those, as I’m on a roll and Oxford Street is nearby, must be able to find one there. But I can’t, try half the street, loads of shops, nowt, ;( turn down though Carnaby street and try there, but still nothing, with sleeves, yes, sleeveless, no It’s getting late now, its started to rain and I must of walked miles, had enough, bus home, and eat my nice bread and cheese. A mostly successful day I think.

Sunday, normally a one liner in my journal, cause, well, I don’t usually do much, but this Sunday, no support to do, no family to visit, no laundry, so hell why not, another Helena day, lets do the whole weekend. Shave after a hot bath, this usually makes it easier, and dress in simple jeans outfit. Once again it’s all far to matched to look properly casual.

For some reason I decide to skip the wig. I have longish hair, but it’s very thin, and almost all gone on top But a hat covers all that up. Hrm run out of night cream and makeup remover wipes, so trip to the chemist is in order, and then there’s still that grey sleeveless top I want. But since its lunchtime when I leave the flat, and even after all the food shopping the day before I don’t have anything in for lunch (did I eat that much on Saturday night?) decide to be a devil and stop in my local for a Sunday Roast and glass of wine. I only get about half a dozen roasts a year, so it’s a real treat (and it’s lamb, me bad) There’s about 5 people in the pub, and 2 of them are the staff, so no problems. Finish my wine off with another chapter from my book, then head towards Islington to the chemists and to walk off that lunch.

By now I realised I might of made a booboo with the lack of wig and just outed myself to my neighbourhood (as well as the pub I stopped in a couple of shops). With my own hair and a hat, Helena doesn’t look that different from Ian (who often wears a hat and jeans too), OK he doesn’t wear makeup and often has some stubble, but the connection could be made. Errr, Errr OK sod it, don’t care, nobody round here really knows me personally anyway, continue towards Islington. But a kid on bike shouts “You’re a man” as he passes, hope it wasn’t the same one who shouted at me on Friday.

Pass a sort of Brazilian/latin ish themed bar, Barrio North, on Essex road, open by the looks of it, but empty. There’s a sign in the window offering a free cup of coffee between 12 and 3 on Sundays, well I can’t resist that, fancy a coffee too. It is free, good too and the service is great. Finish another chapter of my book and leave a tip on the way out. Could be a nice place for a night out.

Wandering through the shops at Angel I see a grey tee shirt in Gap, has sleeves, but apart from that, it’s right, buy it and intended to cut most of the serves off and fold the rest back and sew them up. Get my anti aging and anti wrinkle moisturiser in Superdrug and some magic pants in M&S. If I’m spending so much time as Helena, I’m going to need more pants (and some magic).

I like this sitting in a bar reading thing, so yet another chapter and glass of wine in Pitcher and Piano. Barman asks about my hat. Then one last chapter in Starbucks with another coffee. The book is called The Electric Church by Jeff Somers, it’s a dystopian SF thriller and is pretty good.

Back towards home, drop into the local public library, lived here for years and this the first time I’ve ever been in. They have a small SF section, hrrrm, could I join as Helena? Home and have 2 cameras full of pictures to sort out.

So that’s pretty much a whole Helena weekend, a few ups and downs, but manageable, might have to do this more often.

Monday, work, pop into town at lunch time and spot perfect grey sleeveless top for my BSG outfit in Primark for 2 quid. Why didn’t I see this before? well I suppose it being in the Men’s section might have had something to do with it. gioca a poker gratispoker pc gameseven card stud onlinepoker sala giochiwww poker gratistorneo poker gratispoker superstars gratispoker machine gratispoker pc gratisplay free 7 card stud online,7 card stud,giochi seven card studgioca poker online gratispoker downloadpoker regole di giocodownload giochi pokerpoker online in italianotexas holdem rulesseven card stud inlineadownload poker on lineslots machine gratisgioco crapscasino on line legaliplay blackjack onlinevideo poker machinebaccarat gratisgioco baccarat gratisgiochi da casino gratisbwin casinocasino en lineacasino baccaratenquete casino on netjack black in lineacasino on line con bonusgioco gratuitovincere casino onlineroulette virtualesistemi per roulettecasino gratis slot machinegiocare alla roulettecasino online con bonuswww casino gratisplay keno onlineaprire un casino onlinegiochi on line roulettegiochi casino da scaricare gratisdownload roulette gratisgiochi slotsno deposit casino on linesexy casino onlinevincere alla roulette onlineslots machines

Needed a bit of a quiet week and a bit of a detox. Abstained from meat, alcohol, drugs and sex all week, well OK I needed a beer after work on Friday (that sort of week), so blew that, drugs, I’ve never actually done any of them at all ever (unless coffee counts as one), and no sex is every week anyway, but did manage to stay veggie (er apart from fish). So not exactly a detox then. Cut back on the shopping too, well er, no, had some strange plan to go out in blue tights at the weekend, I blame Andi on Roses for posting a pic in hers. Thursday shopping and the blue tights demanded some new nail varnish, but after wandering into New Look on the off chance, also picked up (yet another) mini skirt and top (on sale, £8 for the two). Then on Friday night, Black Uggs from Barrats (yey, size 9 in stock) and a long skirt high waisted pencil with braces (another one, but it fits this time) from Vestry. Had seen that exact skirt being worn by head of IT’s PA at work during the week and I wanted one, reckoned it would suit me better too Me bad.

Saturday, again no big plans, just popping to Camden in those silly blue tights to pick up some of the sort of things that are easy to get there. Plus I wanted to see what damage the fire had done. Dressing, top isn’t exactly the right shade and is slightly to big, nail varnish is pretty, but its more silvery light blue than it appears on the bottle, needed to be darker, can’t find skirt I wanted to wear (found later in the laundry) and those blue tights are just too thin. Compromise with that new denim mini, its got a black leopard skin print over it which sort of adds to the trashy look and layer a thin pair of black tights over the blue ones, this make them look darker, plus should be warmer. The result is well a bit trashy and clashy, but sort of works.

Been thinking about my choices of clothing recently and have come to the conclusion when I try to go casual, it still ends up being too structured, often just two colours, far to much black, trying to match everything, but isn’t quite right. Been noticing how casually dressed women and girls often have outfits that look like it could be thrown together quickly, with multiple colours and textures some matching, some complementing, some contrasting, but when done right, it all seems to work very well. I reckon it does take some thought to put together clothes like that. Current outfit isn’t that causal, try harder with that another time, instead think it comes out a sort of trashy boho/rock thing, not exactly blending in, but hopefully not wrong enough to stand out too much, well in Camden anyway. The big camera comes out.

Figured out how to trigger the flash remotely away from the camera (RTFM), so I can set up better light, like the results, taken at F11 for sharpness, and yet even against a window in the background, I’m well illuminated with a flattering light. Minimal retouch is required. Think I’m a convert to the strobist cause

Add a hat and scarf as it looks cold and windy out and in no hurry, am on a train to Camden by 11:30 ish. Just go shopping. Get coffee, food, very cheap little cropped denim jacket from Atlantic, some tights and seemed stockings (hopefully these will fit better than my last pair), darker blue nail varnish and look for some boots. Got the sensible, comfortable, normal and still reasonably fashionable black Uggs during the week, but the weekends target was a pair of uncomfortable, kinky, stereotypical black thigh boots. Why, well because I wanted some, that’s why and I have a outfit or two planned for them, yes they go with the Tranny Tart stereotype, but well I do sensible smart or casual most of the time when out, alternative or clubby for nights out, but I like a fantasy outfit now and then in the privacy of my own flat. Not sure about this “I only wear blah blah blah” sort of thing I hear some T people come out with, why? Why not experiment and have fun, matching outfits to moods and situations. So that’s my justification for the thigh boots it’s not cause I’m a perv, honest. Why do I feel the need to justify my purchase to you? Probably because I feel the need to justify it to myself as well.

Spot a pair in one of the many boot and leather jacket shops that seem to line Camden High Street, black, real leather, lace up, steel heel, look well made, not like the cheap looking PVC ones a lot of places have. They are the Spanish “New Rock” brand that makes a lot of Goth style boots, a Camden favourite judging by the number of people I see stomping about in them. But they would never have my size would they, they never do, but ask anyway on the off. 3 minutes later the guy in the comes back with a box containing a pair in size Euro 43 and asks if I want to try them on!! Actually he asks if I want to try them on in the back part of the shop, I agree, for modesty’s sake. I’m not sure if he wanted me around the back because he was embarrassed about having a tranny trying on thigh boots for all to see, but his behaviour is perfectly civil. They fit, not perfect, bit tight around the foot, little loose around the thigh, but are manageable and are surprising easy to walk in, since they are leather they should stretch a bit with wear too. Sold. Change back my regular boots. Well that was easy

Carry on wandering around, have what I wanted now, but there’s no reason to rush home. Walk around the Canal market where the fire was, it’s all closed off and boarded up.

Looking through the barricades, I think a section of the market near to the canal survived fairly intact, but the buildings in the centre of that block have been gutted. Sad really, still nobody as far as I know was hurt and they can rebuild.

Carry on around the Stables market just for a nosey, and see they have opened up a new bit, buried under the railway arches, so as one bit is demolished another bit pops up. Life and markets go on.

Do the usual find a quiet spot and get my “I was out dressed, honest” photo. Still feel I need to take these shots, evidence to prove it was all real, perhaps to myself as much as anyone. Picture comes out nice though, makeup seems to be working well today, odd looks and comments see to be few and far between too even in this unsubtle outfit, but then again, it is Camden.

Woman on a food stall hands me a free sample as I pass, oh tastes nice, oh dam, it’s chicken isn’t it. I haven’t gone veggie, but am trying to cut back on meat (is this symbolic?). But this makes me hungry, lunch time. New (well I hadn’t seen it before) pasta stall near the lock that allows you to chose exactly what want and get it cooked to order, go with (have some help in choosing) mushroom Tagliatelle with blue cheese, pesto, courgettes and chilli. A combination I name Pasta Lurve and very nice it is too.

It looks like the weather is going to turn any minute, so head back home, via the supermarket. Still paranoid about the last time I came here and dropped a bottle of wine, so just get packets of stuff and decide to buy liquids elsewhere. Fancy sitting down for another coffee or perhaps a glass of wine, but the trains coming in a minute and it’s started spitting rain, so back towards home. Train is pretty full, sit on first available seat, next to a woman, but opposite a, frankly, slightly creepy looking, guy. Think he’s asleep though. But he shifts his legs and manages to brush his foot against my leg. Then he does that again, once could be an accident, but twice within a couple of minutes? much less likely, makes me very uncomfortable, fortunately the train is now nearly at my station (it’s only a very short trip), get up and wait by the door until the train stops and get out promptly. Men!

Nearly home, and it’s the weekend, fancy some beer to go with dinner and my DVD’s that evening. Quiet night in was planed, I was on call and couldn’t go out at night anyway (and that’s also why my weekend trip out was just a quick visit to Camden). Plus I had a mounting stack of unwatched DVD’s that needed attention. Get to local off license and although I’ve used it in Helena mode several times before (in fact it’s where I went the first time outside dressed so long time ago) , but spot the same woman on the till who served Ian the previous night, loose my nerve and head towards the other offy along the road.

Which turns out to be a good call, a closed down deli next door to the off license has reopened as a cool independent coffee shop. Get my sit down and with a coffee (good too) after all. Do manage a little small talk with the young man behind the counter, find out the place has only been open 6 days and they plan to serve ice cream in the summer. Definitely worth a return visit. Get my beer (hey I’m a trashy alternative boho blonde rock chick in leather, leopard skin and blue tights, I can drink beer (from the can If I really want to ) and stroll home.

Quiet evening in with DVD player is disturbed by a text from a machine demanding attention, some services need to be started manually. A fairly routine task, but it’s the first time I’ve done it while wearing in a mini skirt.

Wednesday last week, up at 5:45 (normal time sob :(), in work by 8am, out of work past 5pm. It was a pretty mad week, probably worked 6 days worth in 5. All this work just try and install and configures some new software, that on a basic Windows box would of taken a couple of hours, but my company can’t do anything that simple, 3 separates boxes, 3 different OS’s, multi homing, all in non standard configurations running various databases and application servers that are barely supported by the new application with firewalls everywhere all add up to (to me anyway) a bit of a IT nightmare, adding an extra 27ish layers of potential fail to what should be a fairly simple application.

Back to the story, managed to duck out “early” on Wednesday, and forgo the usual walk/train for a bus, train, a quickly scoffed pasty and a tube home to save time. Reason for the rush was a mid week Helena night, not my usual sort of thing, but hey I was getting too samey. Elephant Shelf the blues band that has a couple of TG members I’ve seen a few times where in a sort of “battle of the bands” competition/festival called Emergenza (link), they had made it to the 2nd round and where trying to drum up support so they can through to the 3rd, as the competition was based on audience votes. The 2nd round was being held that Wednesday in the Purple Turtle bar in Camden. Well Camden wasn’t far, I like a bit of a tune and reckoned I could make it in time, so had decided to go along and add my support.

Get home and immediately attack my face with a razor, not good, blood everywhere, 3rd Tranny grade shave in 5 days (previous Friday and Saturday) doesn’t go down well with my skin simple jeans, top and leather jacket outfit with my fav brown boots and a quickish slap job and I’m out before 9, for me that’s fast. But still a huge rush, my look isn’t great and it still took over two and a half hours to get ready, no wonder I don’t go out mid week that often. On the way to the tube station it takes a bit longer than normal to find my walk and get comfortable, haven’t worn those boots in a while and getting used to 9cm heels again takes an effort, daft choice of footwear really. Got a few looks on the way, probably a mixture of the height and the awkward walk getting me noticed.

Get to the Purple Turtle around 9, the 2nd band of the night are playing and er where is everybody? It’s very busy but I appear to be the only dressed TG person in the place (that I could see). A number of people had indicated on Roses that they where coming along, I guess I was early (so why did I rush?) I know the Shelf where one of the later bands on the bill, but I sort of though people would be here by now. Oh well, get a drink and bop along to the band.

The band (2nd one on the bill, I’d missed the first) where a trio of lads Aphelionlive, a guitar player, a keyboard player and vocalist and anther in his pants who sung a bit and jumped around a lot (listed as a “Bez” on the website ). Live, not exactly quite a bit was sequenced, but they where energetic, fun, sound good, put in a bit of a performance and got the crowd are dancing. Enjoyed them, would of danced more, but I had the big camera and a drink and didn’t want to spill the later on the former. Start taking pictures.

Actually with those heels and me being 6′ I’m one of the tallest people in the room, and there’s a bit to the side raised a few inches I can stand on, so getting pics of the bands over every one’s heads is easy. Maybe those boots weren’t such a daft idea after all. After each band finish there set there’s a show of hands from the audience that is used to determine who wins and goes through to the 3rd round. There are 8 bands on, 4 will go through, plus a 5th voted for by the bands themselves. I was there to vote for the Shelf, but vote for Apelionlive as well, since I rather enjoyed them. I try not to be partisan and just vote trans.

Next band was another trio of lads, Insomniac, very young these, teens/early twenties? they play fast, loud and distorted rock, not metal more a bit emo/indie/what ever it’s called this week. Can’t sing for toffee though. I guess they have a myspace page, but I can’t find it, there seems to be about 57 bands called Insomniac there.

Vicky and Dianna of Elephant shelf turn up during the set, we say (more shout) hello, but it’s hard to have a conversation when a young rock band turned all the way up to eleven are a few metres away (OK it’s hard to have a conversation when its quiet too, but that’s just me).

Next band are Piper Saint, another rock trio, bit more indie this time I think, 2 lads and girl on vocals and lead guitar. Sound pretty good, vocals gets a bit lost in the mix though. Probably the most popular band of the night with the crowd, I guess they have a bit of a following and they turned up to support. They get the biggest vote of the night.

Around this time Laura Handbag turns with Chrissie. Well I think that’s when she turned up, a few beers (wine just isn’t rock), being tired and some very very loud music affected my recall of the evening a bit. We talk and get drinks.

There are now a few Trans people in the room, so what happens, we start taking pictures of each other

Kim West and Nicky B turn up later too, more pictures:)

The other girls are a bit glam, feel a bit under dressed. The bar seems OK with us, notice a few people looking my way, more curious than anything I guess, no hassle though.

Next band are called Free Reign more youngish lads playing rock, bit more tuneful this time though, not that bad really, need to work on the look and the performance a bit, not the most exciting bunch to listen to, Laura thinks the band are a bit Dad Rock. The crowd seemed to have thinned out a bit, Piper Saint’s fans have left the building.

Next band are The Grifters, another rock trio, bit older, a touch more classic rock, but with a punky tint, quite like.

And then it’s Elephants shelf set, normally they take there time and play for a couple of hours, but tonight they (like all the other bands) have 5 minutes to setup and 25 minutes to play, so no noodling tonight, its full blast. Laura and several other are dancing away up front, I sway along a bit in the corner and try to get a few more pictures.

I think they go down well, plenty of people dancing and cheering, and not just from their regular fans. Not bad considering it’s a mostly young and trendy indie/emo ish sort of crowd. After the vote I say my goodbyes and leave, missing the last band, it’s getting towards midnight and I’m tried, hungry and partially deaf. Grab some chocolate and crisps (how healthy) from a shop on the way. My normal tube line is closed, so it’s a bit of an arse to get home, have to change twice, and there’s no chippy between the stop I have to get off at and my place Notice I’d lost the lens cap when putting the camera away, Damm. Try my best to remove every scrap of slap and crash into bed around one.

Up again next morning at 5:45, tired, ratty and ears still ringing a bit, nearly bite the head off a security guard at work who wanted to see my pass. Find out later the Shelf did get through to the next round, they just missed the audience vote for the top 4 (oops shouldn’t have voted for the other bands as well should I) but made it through on the vote from the other bands. The 3rd round will be at Dingwalls in Camden in late April, I’ll try to go along to add my vote, but they will probably need more support than that, can any of you make it along as well?

Friday, well the software looks like it’s in, but we are not 100% certain, get out of work pronto trying to decide what to wear at the weekend. Time to dig the combats out again, perhaps with the Uggs for comfort, yeah go with that, but what top? well I’ll need something sort of light beige (ooh sexy) to match the footwear. Can’t find one suitable and cheap enough in my regular places, but just wandering into Islington GAP on the off chance (beige, it’s a GAPish sort of colour), I see one, almost ideal and on the clearance rack for a fiver. Sold.

Don’t manage to get up early on Saturday, and really I’m not in a hurry to get out, still tired. Face really doesn’t like being shaved again, more blood, have to knock this on the head for oooo at least 6 days. Overdo the makeup, well I’ve been demure and “natural” the last 3 times out, so some glittery pink eyeshadow on the lids, too much blusher and heavily lined Viva Glam IV lippy, perhaps I’m getting in touch with my inner drag queen Find a boot I though I’d lost, wear them and a different coat to the one I had planned. Looks windy out, so find a beret that goes. It ends up all a bit urban casual, “Init”, not a bad look, perhaps some more bling would of helped It’s a bit tight too, in fact I’m feeling a bit tubby, don’t seem to be able to get back into the diet habit next week I will, honest.

I like the pictures, there’s bright morning sunlight streaming though the window near the stairs, and the flash isn’t necessary, 24mm wide angle lens, F6.3, 1/8 shutter, ISO about 160 and it’s good. OK the framing is off, but its hard to get perfect when using a remote. The natural light fills in wrinkles and so very little post work is required (I’m so vain) and they are sharp, very sharp. I think they are some of the best ever pictures I’ve ever got of me. The Flickr massive disagrees though, not many views, not enough skin I guess.

Out by 11ish, but what to do? Er shopping I guess, there’s some things I need/want/desire. I’ve done this shopping thing so many times now neither you nor me need the details, so what follows is edited highlights…

Coffee, DVD’s, local market as well as the big shops, bus ride, Replacement lens cap from Jaccobs, latest Iain M Banks from FP, nice hot Lentil Dahl at a  Just Falafs on Wardor street, replacement watch from Next.

Eventually find the new flagship H&M on Regents street, was looking for a particular skirt, but they only have it 8’s, spot other skirt, synthetic leather micro and size 10, try on, fits, but only just, its practically spray on, but they don’t have 12. Very tarty, WOCware Find skirt I wanted in 12 in other branch of H&M (I’m not that impressed by the flagship) and exchange tiny skirt for a 12 as I was worried the 10 might undergo structural integrity failure if I wore it dancing. Tried skirt I was looking for at home, black pencil with braces, doesn’t fit, to tight and the braces are to short, sob so it’s going back for a 14, now I feel fat. Other size 12 pencil without braces from Vestery bought on Friday fits OK though.

More coffee, Starbucks get my order right twice in one day! Think about seeing a film but would of had to wait an hour or more, so it’s off to Covent Garden, then Waitrose and then the bus home. Been pointing my camera at random stuff all day.

All shops where fine, changing rooms not a problem and Misses (Yes :)) and Madams all the way. Was noticed quite a few times, but no one made an issue of it. I guess it’s the surprise and novelty of seeing a tranny out and about more than anything, though some people are more subtle about it than others. For instance, bloke being dragged around Holborn New Look by his better half spots me and nudges her and points at me, then manoeuvres around to try and get a better look.

Get a couple of what I think are nice pictures of yours truly along the way.

So that’s it, 4 Helena sessions in 9 days, my face, liver and bank account felt that.
Next weekend is got to be a quiet one.

Visit my Mum on Sunday.